Looking back...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Looking back...
2
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 8:50pm

Looking back on your marriage and subsequent separation/divorces what would you say was the biggest problem you had?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
In reply to: mumtoone
Fri, 09-12-2008 - 9:51pm

I could say that it was because I didn't know about my DH"s mental illness until after we got married, but there were enough signs of something being wrong before we got married that I should have known better.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2001
In reply to: mumtoone
Sat, 09-13-2008 - 3:18pm

I think you're absolutely right in your thoughts! It's the MARRIAGE that counts, not the wedding. And if you don't learn from your divorce, you're going to end up making the same mistakes again.

I think that planning the wedding but not the marriage can be equated to a friend of mine who worked REALLY hard to get pregnant. She wanted to get pregnant more than anything in the world, and when she was about 5 months pregnant, she panicked because she forgot she was going to have to have a baby and be a parent! (I got pregnant with DD13 soon after she did, and I was the opposite. I wanted the baby but forgot that I had to be PREGNANT for 9 months!)

~calla~  mom to rosie (DD13) and gracie (DD9)




Edited 9/13/2008 8:25 pm ET by callalily65

~calla~  mom to rosie and gracie