How will I do this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
How will I do this?
6
Sun, 09-21-2008 - 10:21pm
So, my husband and I are filing for a separation. After 2 years of marriage and 6 years of a relationship - we have decided that we need to separate. While the decision was made calmly - I am a wreck. I'm 28 and feel like I'm giving up on the possibility on ever having the family I once dreamed of and the life (love) I pictured. There are valid reasons that our marriage is wrong - but how do you breath during this? I'm constantly crying and having panic attacks. My head knows this is right - but my heart is struggling.
Any advice on making it through these early stages? I'm scared I'm going to cave and run back to it because of how alone and scared I feel.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 4:01pm

Hi Sarah,


Sorry to hear of your situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 4:12pm

Thank you for your reply. Those feelings are so real to me. I have been seeing a therapist and have been put on an anti-depressant; however, it's only been three days and I don't feel any better. I'm hoping that I just need to take it longer.

The feelings are so intense and so scary. I thought I would be planning my family at this point (even had maternity days saved) - but now I'm back at square one. It's so upsetting.

I wish you all the best and all the strength as well. You are not alone - if anything, that is what I am hoping this teaches me. That we are good enough to be treated with love and compassion - and, that we are not alone.

THank you again,
Sarah

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 9:33pm

Sarah.... no, you aren't alone... and you do deserve so much!...


What are you taking?... Many anti-depressants take several days to weeks to fully get in your system where you notice a change.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 10:03pm

Thank you!

I'm taking something similar to Lexapro - Fluexietin (sp). It was cheaper with my insurance plan.

It's been a really difficult couple of days.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 10:08pm

It will get better!.... in the meantime, try to get some exercise and be sure you are getting enough rest.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2008
Mon, 09-22-2008 - 10:59pm

Well I feel EXACTLY how you do. I am 29 and getting ready to separate and divorce.