anxiety..is it just fear or fate

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2008
anxiety..is it just fear or fate
3
Wed, 10-22-2008 - 2:58pm
I would love to find someone to talk to about the anxiety i wake up with during my divorce. I am ending an almost 29 year marriage. Is there anyone who decided to end her marriage, got though it and can tell me what the other side is like. i wake up with anxiety every night, or every morning and i dont know if this is just fear of change, or if
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 10-22-2008 - 3:11pm
I don't have the exact circumstances as you, but I can't imagine anyone ending a long marriage who wouldn't have anxiety, because you can never be 100% sure that you are doing the wrong thing. I think any big change causes anxiety--if you look at those lists of what kind of things cause stress and potential illness, they list happy things like getting married too. Are you going to any counseling to help you through this time?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2008
Wed, 10-22-2008 - 8:19pm

Hi tealeaves,


Yes, I understand. I went through major anxiety, including a panic attack when I first left STBX. In fact, it made me think I was doing the wrong thing. I went back to him, but quite soon after, I realized that it was over, and I was just having fear over the next phase of my life.


It will pass! It's just your body dealing with the stress. I agree; you should speak to a counselor, and if you're not opposed to medication, it may help. I went on Lexapro, and I'm REALLY glad I did. It made a huge difference in my life, because I didn't realize that along with the anxiety, I was pretty depressed.


Please don't worry (easy to say!) because it doesn't mean you're making the wrong decision. It's just new, and new can be scary. But scarier to me is staying with an abuser, which mine is.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2003
Wed, 10-22-2008 - 11:03pm

Change takes a lot of strength to endure and significant courage to induce.