only 5 years-giving up too soon?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2008
only 5 years-giving up too soon?
4
Wed, 10-29-2008 - 11:08pm

Hi there-Ill try to be as short as possible. Nov 8th will be my 5th anniversary and we have a 4 year old.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 12:22am

Hi, I don't know how much help I can be, but I am there. My H has had 7 year itch for a couple of years now. he wants a divorce, I say ok, within a day he is "seeing" a new woman, within a week he finds somethign stupid about her he doesnt like and comes to me. I was stupid the first 3 times it happened. Now this third time, I don't knwo if I can do it. I love him with all my heart, but I can't keep getting hurt like this. He claims he wants a divorce because we aren't a good fit and we are better friends. Plus add in 2 boys and the fact i am 4 months pregnant with number 3.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 7:21am

Confused,


If you lost everything you owned tomorrow, would you stay with your husband and work with him to regain your housing, income, and future together?


Your honest answer to that question will tell you what really motivates you in your relationship. Frankly, are you married for material status or for compatibility and love? Are

CL-Wisdomtooth2020

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 10:51am

Wow-wisdomtooth2020, what incredible advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2006
Fri, 10-31-2008 - 12:08pm

Confused,


Hi. I hope your husband will agree to marriage counseling. Remember, go in the spirit of discovery of your issues, not the idea that you're going to "fix" him or he's going to "fix" you. That way lies disappointment and frustration!


Some other advice:


1)Living apart during marriage counseling can be positive if properly structured.

CL-Wisdomtooth2020