I hate my brother's fiance!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
I hate my brother's fiance!
6
Sun, 07-04-2004 - 11:14am
None of us like her. The more we know her the less we like her and I don't like how my brother has changed either. This is really hard because Matt and I have always been really close. From the beginning I was upset about this because is seemed off to me.He took one of my other sister's to help him get a ring - the one that is all about namebrands and image and quite honestly - is pretty shallow and self-absorbed a lot of the time. She is improving but this isn't about her - his fiance is all about gucci and bebe and coach and the fact that she just graduated from college and is already crabbing about "not making enough" money. Immature ladies - VERY VERY VERY - and so incredibly fake - to the point where you look and her and wonder where she thinks the cameras are. And my brother has always been a little short tempered and prone to wieght gain but has always worked hard on both things. Now he is RUDE, gaining wieght so fast I can't believe it, and excludes himself at family functions - with her. Yesterday ever single time I spoke to him or her they had to contradict something I said and argue with me and then unwilling agree and roll their eyes. I felt like I was talking to a couple 15 year olds! I am talking about stupid stuff too - like me saying Trader Joes is a great maket and them arguing about it when they had never even been there! My brother has been working 70 hours a week as a GM contractor to get money for their ridiculously large wedding and extravagant honeymoon.

Anyways yesterday he finally got to me too much when he mentioned the work and I said that it was a problem how these companies in the area were hiring more and more contractors that will work OT and then not hire people that can only work a normal week, also not having to pay benefits either to the contractors. It has NOTHING to do with him and no one but him took it personally. Then he got all mean and I explained I wasn't referring to him in particular. And he just got more and mroe mad and finally I told him that I was sick of the way he had been acting lately, that he had changed (I am sure because of the hoe) and he better figure out why and get bakc to himself because I couldn't stand it. I pointed out other things he had done that day that were rude and condescending. I told him to get it together and not call me till he could.

But he won't. I will have to go to him but honestly I can't do it without telling him that I think he is making the most HORRIBLE mistake of his life. This b!tch will be pregnant before you know it if possible. I can tell. Not only that - she is gaining wieght too. Neither of them of taking care of themselves anylonger and my once sweet brother is now a snob who gets ticked at every little thing.

Does anyone have any advice for me. If I tell him he will hate me. I don't want him to be miserable and he IS - why can't he see it?? He will deny it forever too. I personally think that when youare happy you take care of yourself more...don't you think? I just want miss fake to hit the road.

OH - and this was rich - she tells me at dinner yesterday that she had a dream that Jack and I were over and I was telling her "Don't you get it b!tch - my brother had been trying to dump you for months" and she said in her dream she DECKED ME!

#1 - Why would you tell me that!??????

#2 - Ya think chick? Hmmmmm

UGH

Laura

PS - i told her she must be a very insecure person LMAO~

Avatar for mandymi
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Mon, 07-05-2004 - 10:22pm

((((((Laura))))))




http://somedaysijustworkhere.blogspot.com/">

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Tue, 07-06-2004 - 11:23am
I know family can be hard. My ds' dad's family is a different bunch. They put up and continue to put up with a drug addict son with a princess girlfriend. This is my ex's younger brother. She is NOT liked by my ex's dad, he barely speaks hello to her. While he has always loved me (what's not to love LOL) and would welcome me with a big hug and kiss on the cheek- he nods in her direction. She is horrible. When I was pregnant, I got in a fight with her bf, my bil, and she started going off on me. HELLO? Who's in the arguement????? I did not like that. And she was going on about how I thought I was all high and mighty special because I was pregnant. Of course I was! The whole family was excited! GRRR

Anyways, I don't have to deal with her anymore, to which I am thankful.

Alison

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 07-06-2004 - 12:23pm
Yah, Dale Carnegie's theory on people is that above the basic needs - they need to feel "important" I guess some people need it more than others LOL!

I personally find actions like this a sign of major immaturity (I recall being like that at about ummm 15 LOL)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 07-06-2004 - 12:28pm
Dang - well glad I am not the only one hehehe - my mom says to just laugh at her and I do sort of - I am more worried about how my brother is acting. You want to hear something funny? I posted to EXACT same post on my other board and all their responses centered around my comment that my brother was getting fat hahahhaa - I just had to mention it. I know my brother - I know that he is misabel when he looks that way and lets himself get that way. This is a guy that got painful injections in his skull for a year to cure a bald spot you couldn't even SEE (because of and autoimmune disorder that effects hair) I can see it and he is mean. I could care less about her - if she wants to be that way fine but don't make my brother miserable or change him - ya know?

But you know I made my mistakes too - however that makes me an expert ;)

(yah sure lmao!)

L

Avatar for cl_beckty
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Tue, 07-06-2004 - 12:54pm

My advice is: This is your brother's fiance. You can't change that. You can't make her different. You can either accept that he is in love with her and will probably marry her (pregnant or not) and be as much of a sister as you can be. Or, you can alienate yourself.


The ball is 100% in your court to respond appropriately.


(this is coming from someone who has been there/done that with siblings who make bad choices)

Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2003
Tue, 07-06-2004 - 1:05pm

I have been in your situation and it's best to just be thankful people can't read minds and say nothing.