What do you expect?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
What do you expect?
6
Sun, 12-12-2004 - 7:28pm

I was just on another board reading a post from someone who was disappointed that her boyfriend of less than three months went on a business trip and only bought her a chocolate bar.

It got me thinking about the time that a friend of mine agreed to babysit a cat for another friend for a week and was upset that this friend "repaid" her by giving her a shot glass from the place she had gone on holidays.

Is it just me- I would NEVER expect a gift from ANYONE who went away, friend, boyfriend, family. Even if I was watching their house, animals or children, I wouldn't EXPECT anything in return, if I had been asked to do the favour and agreed, it would be because I want to be there for that person, not thinking of what I might get out of the deal.

Any thoughts?

Alison

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Sun, 12-12-2004 - 8:48pm
I agree with you. Expectations get one in trouble all the time!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sun, 12-12-2004 - 10:45pm
I agree with you! I think the same way. I house sat and took care of my sisters dog once summer while she and her family went to Mexico and I wasn't expecting anything. I was very pleasantly surprised when she gave me a hand painted ceramic candy dish and a small matching jewelry box for my daughter. But I wasnt expecting it, nor would I expect anything more than a phone call from my SO if he was going on a business trip. Gifts brought from trips should be appreciated not expected.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 10:41am
It TOTALLY depends on the chocolate!!!

Kim

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 1:07pm
All I would expect is that they might return the favor sometime. I certainly would not want a shot glass or a t-shirt. I'm trying to rid myself of unnecessary belongings, not add to my clutter. A chocolate bar is nice, but if I really wanted a chocolate bar I'd go buy one for myself.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 1:27pm

Too true!


I you have agreed to do something for someone and expect payment of any kind, you absolutely MUST negotiate that in the beginning. Otherwise, consider it a favor. Be appreciative of a token gift of thanks, and enjoy, but don't ever expect it.


As the saying goes, NO ONE can stick their head up your backside and read your mind. If you expect anything in return, make it clear ahead of time.


On the gal disappointed about the chocolate bar from a 3 month boyfriend, that's just too bad. She's either got A) Mr. non-committed or B) Mr. never-thinks-to-buy-a-nice-gift-for-his-best-girl. So what. If she likes him, she should say thanks for the chocolate and move on. If she needs a man who is a gift giver, OR if she expects more because she feels there's been a greater commitment to this point, then she has a decision to make.

Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2002
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 4:41pm
I agree, especially about the business trip gift-getting.