I guess it's over

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2004
I guess it's over
20
Fri, 01-07-2005 - 10:09pm

Well, I guess that it was too good to be true with the guy from work I've been seeing for the last couple of months.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 12:56am
Good for you for making a tough decision that you know is the right one. It's not easy and I'm sure it's not going to be easy any time soon since you have to see each other at work. At least you tried and now you know it wouldn't have worked. I'm sure that isn't much consolation right now though :(

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 9:15am

You poor thing. It is really hard to just watch a relationship "go down the tubes" so to speak.

I think you should try to take heart in the fact that it was about him and not about you. You certainly deserve better!! And you will find it - you did good with this decision!!

But even though you know it is the right decision it is not easy, as firstammendment said. And it is hard when you have to see him at work every day. And harder still when you can't talk about it.

Keep us posted. Take care of yourself in the mean time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 12:19pm

Aww honey,

What a rough week! I can totally understand your needing more rest, you've been through a lot emotionally and it's been draining on you.

It's hard when we realize what the other person is up to and worse when we can't just hear it from them. You try to just brush it off that they just don't have the time this week, and make up all sorts of excuses for their behaviour, but in the end, you've known the truth all along.

I wish you the strength to get through this and have the talk.

Alison

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2005
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 1:15pm

It's good that you are making the decision instead of just being passive about it.

I read "He's Just Not That Into You" last night at B&N (my daughter was reading manga). It's an easy read and there were some hilarious things in there. Like when a guy says he didn't MEAN to sleep with someone else? The author's comment is "100% of guys we polled said they had never had sex with someone accidentally. All of them wanted to know how such an accident could occur though and how they could be involved." Yep...

If he's not calling much, he's not that into you. I HATE hearing that, don't you? Because they should ALL be SO into us...we're cool and smart and sweet and sexy. *sigh*...but men aren't always aware.

Hang in there...take care of you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 5:48pm
Thanks so much for all of your support.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 6:19pm
She sounds very sweet :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 7:50pm
Candi, I am DELIGHTED that you read that book. I can't wait to see your philosophies and hear your responses.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 7:50pm
Your daughter sounds like an angel!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2004
Sat, 01-08-2005 - 9:55pm
Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Sun, 01-09-2005 - 10:53am

Here's the thing I'm finding out. Men are different from the way they used to be. I don't know if it's that we're older or if it's that times have changed. But, when a relationship starts to stall, they just don't do anything. They don't admit it. They just stop calling as much. They stop making plans. They don't talk about it.

When I was younger, the guy would just pick a fight and then you knew it was over. Now, it's so vague and it comes out of the blue.

Best wishes. If it doesn't feel right and you know it, then break it off. With the last guy I dated things went in the tubes after 2 or 3 months, but we limped along for another 4 months and it was a total waste of time. I felt bad about myself because he didn't want to spend much time with me or pay me any attention.

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