advice needed
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advice needed
| Wed, 12-06-2006 - 12:17am |
Hi I'm new here and I have a question for you guys and gals. At my job, we recently hired a new computer wiz type. He does everything and anything to do with our network and computers, but thats not the point. I thought that a overweight 40 year old or a 15 year old would be hired, but boy was I wrong when I saw him. WOW!!! is all I can say, this man made me drool, he's about 5'10 he has an amazingly great looking face, cute curly hair hazel eyes and a great body(I mean a six pack, nice pecs and nice arms, but not too muscle bound and a perfect butt)he's really smart and from a little chat that I had with our HRM he's making 70k and he's only 20. This is my dream man, but I'm affraid to pursue anything with him because my son who is only 7 gets upset when I have other men over at the house. I really am interested in this guy because just his smile made me so wet that I had to remove my panties during work!!!. Any advice would be appreciated because he is a once in a lifetime kind of guy and I don't want to think what if and I don't want to blame my son.

Whoa there, girlfriend!!!
You don't even know this man- how DO you know he is your dream man?? He could be gay! Or he could be a total jerk to women. Or he might spend 5 hrs a night working out on his body and has no time for anyone else but himself. Or he might kick dogs in his spare time. Or whatever... you only like him like how someone might get dreamy about a celebrity (looks, money, age) but until you really get to know him, he still might not be the right one for you. Who wouldn't drool over the package with money and brains? But you don't really KNOW anything about who he really is.
AND... it's not like you know he likes YOU or not yet, either. He might even go by the rule that he won't date where he works, too- so you might not even be in the running in his eyes!
Just slow down on all those what-ifs (especially what to do about your ds and him and that whole situation)... you've only just met the guy. There's more to a great mate than just the package (and I know you know that, really). Enjoy the eye candy to make your work hours go faster (find a virus if you have to- lol) but hold back on the dreams until there is some reality in place first.
Just my 2 cents...
And Welcome to the board!
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
Unfortunately, in the big bad dating world, the way you feel does not equate to the way he feels. You are, as Shrimps points out, putting the cart ahead of the horse.
I would advise you to just chill and see if he shows interest. And be careful with dating in the work place.
But we do appreciate your choice in this one - he does sound like the man of every woman's dreams!!!!! And too funny that you expected some 40+ year old and in walks Mr. Universe.
So, do keep us posted - and I do hope you stick around - you can learn a lot about dating here!!
Take a breath there, kiddo!
He sounds like he has what you want - at least as far as the external, very surface things. But you know that does not make a person a "once in a lifetime" kind of guy! Sure, it is possible that he might be everything you hope for once you get to know him. He might feel the same way about you and be perfectly happy to date someone from the workplace. All of that would be awesome!
HOWEVER, you don't know any of that yet. Give it time. Try to get to know him with a realistic eye. In the meantime, enjoy learning about him and getting to know him.
As far as your DS, that is WAY down the line. Until you know if this guy is really right, you don't have to cross that bridge. If that time were to come, you know that your DS will need to learn that you need to have a life too, and it will be good for him to see that you do. Like I said, you are imagining dealing with that situation way too soon, though!
Just enjoy from afar for now! Good luck!
HappyDays
It's great that you have such a nice piece of eye candy at your work, but I do agree with the others that you're putting the cart before the horse.
I think that is encouraging but unless you want to be like the others who are clearly overdoing it, I think you have to assume friendship and chill and not read too much into it.
Perhaps he sees you as safe and just wants to be friends?
Now, if he is calling you after hours and taking you to dinner then we have a different story!
"and one girl even put her panties on his desk while he was out to lunch."
Oh good God... that just gives women such a bad name... **sigh** And like any of us would want the man who would actually RESPOND to that kind of thing?!?? For a fling maybe- and THAT'S IT! But if we want a quality man to have a relationship with... why do such a thing??? JMHO, but geez!!!!!
I'm glad you got a chance to go to lunch with him, and get a peek at what he is like. I still say to not read anything into it. He might just be 'being friendly' and having lunch with a coworker (you) in a just-friends way. I wouldn't jump to any conclusions unless he makes moves for getting together after hours. And even then... I'd tread carefully. I guess I just don't trust men who "look like a prize" and are 'the type' that other women would me giving panties to. I know I don't know him from anything but a stereotype, but I guess only time will tell on any of it. Hew HE is, what he thinks of you, what he is after, etc... only time will tell.
In the meantime... definitely don't throw yourself at him like the others might be doing!!!!
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
Shrimps, you do have such a good way with words. I was laughing at this - see what happens when we turn 40? We are so experienced now! We know better than to put a pair of panties on a guy's desk.
Can you imagine have a bf like that? You would have distraction/competition at every turn. I don't think I could trust one so young to just stick with me.
On the other hand - going to work at that place must be hilarity at its finest. Never a dull moment and certainly better than my home office!