My take is don't worry. I think you handled it well and I think BE will listen to you for what to do with her next call. I think she was being nice - if she knew he was there with you then she knew she couldn't/shouldn't have the kind of conversation she wanted and didn't want to be rude.
Keep doing the Disc Golf - I think it is good if you are working on something like that to bring more friends and things for YOU!!
she couldn't/shouldn't have the kind of conversation she wanted ...
that's the only part that gets me. with her track record the conversations she wanted is probably one that would make me uncomfortable. But I suppose that the real issue is trusting BE to hold the boundary line with her even on phone conversations.
Thanks for the DG group encouragement! I am excited!
"But I suppose that the real issue is trusting BE to hold the boundary line with her even on phone conversations."
It seems he has in the past and while they might not always have the conversation you would want to hear when you are not there, I think he would hold the line on his zipper. At least he has shown that in the past with you from what you say here. As long as he doesn't have a history of cheating/player type behavior, I would not sweat it.
This kind of reminds me of the fine line of my thread. Kid or no kids involved. I often wonder where is the boundary to it all. AND WHY does there have to be a friendship with someone that goes around hurting you all the time. It doesn't make sense. I don't mean to sound like a devils advocate in anyway, but do you think that it's possible that the reason
My thread is actually boundary thread. It is a boundary regarding X spouses but I think it also would really pertain to X girlfriends, lovers, fiance's, etc. I find it very uncomfortable when it all seems tooo "close".
You're right - a big part of all of our lives and our journey through life is learning about and setting our boundaries.
Personally, I've had a tough time with this when it came to my family and friends, but I'm getting better at it - and I honestly think it is a HUGE part of my growth as a person.
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My take is don't worry. I think you handled it well and I think BE will listen to you for what to do with her next call. I think she was being nice - if she knew he was there with you then she knew she couldn't/shouldn't have the kind of conversation she wanted and didn't want to be rude.
Keep doing the Disc Golf - I think it is good if you are working on something like that to bring more friends and things for YOU!!
she couldn't/shouldn't have the kind of conversation she wanted ...
that's the only part that gets me. with her track record the conversations she wanted is probably one that would make me uncomfortable. But I suppose that the real issue is trusting BE to hold the boundary line with her even on phone conversations.
Thanks for the DG group encouragement! I am excited!
Hi you – I hope you had a good weekend!
"But I suppose that the real issue is trusting BE to hold the boundary line with her even on phone conversations."
It seems he has in the past and while they might not always have the conversation you would want to hear when you are not there, I think he would hold the line on his zipper. At least he has shown that in the past with you from what you say here. As long as he doesn't have a history of cheating/player type behavior, I would not sweat it.
My other thought on this goes to boundaries and our right to set them.
I wouldn’t feel comfortable with this at all!
You're right - a big part of all of our lives and our journey through life is learning about and setting our boundaries.
Personally, I've had a tough time with this when it came to my family and friends, but I'm getting better at it - and I honestly think it is a HUGE part of my growth as a person.
Pages