What kind of job do you have that would see therapy as such a terrible thing? To my untrained eye, it seems like that would be the best thing for you right now to figure out all your feelings.
Ah I see. I understand how that could be a problem - as well as one can who isn't in the profession. My other suggestions would be to find a group who participates in some of your hobbies, like Looney did with her karaoke group or pacific's disc golf buddies. There might be a few eligible men around and you'd get to meet new people and make new friends who may also have single male friends. Plus you'd get to do something you like anyway. Hope that helps a little.
I don't know that I have any advice, but what you're telling me is everything I'm fighting so hard against.
I work crazy hours at the hospital just so I can still have some kind of "stay at home mom" feel with my girls. Most of the time I think they're sick of me :)
My advice would be to find some kind of hobby that you're interested in and start doing it. Learn to ski, play bingo, join some kind of doggie club if you have one, go to the gym, go roller blading in the park.. do SOMETHING that is just for you.
When my husband left me I felt so ugly and worthless. I learned that I had to find myself again, and I kind of get that vibe from you that you need to find yourself again. I did it early in the split, and you're doing it later. I know this is going to sound so incredibly silly but one thing I did.. (lol I have to laugh) I got all fixed up one day and just started taking pictures of myself, and flipping through the pictures I was like wow, I'm not ugly, I'm not worthless.. I feel beautiful. Once I started feeling that way about myself again was when I was ready to start dating again.
Don't be afraid of the online dating stuff.. just be very selective of who you go out with. I spend weeks sometimes a month getting to know someone online and over the phone before a date, and most of the time the date still bombs lol. However, I'm comfortable on the dates.. I don't feel like I'm out with some psycho. I'm out with a nice guy seeing if there is any kind of spark.
I work in the field of law enforcement.
Ah I see. I understand how that could be a problem - as well as one can who isn't in the profession. My other suggestions would be to find a group who participates in some of your hobbies, like Looney did with her karaoke group or pacific's disc golf buddies. There might be a few eligible men around and you'd get to meet new people and make new friends who may also have single male friends. Plus you'd get to do something you like anyway. Hope that helps a little.
I
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
I know for EAP (employmee assistance plan) that such counseling is confidential so I wonder who would know if you don't tell anyone?
Another idea is that some churches has pastoral counseling for free or very inexpensive. So you can go under the guise of getting spiritual guidance.
Mark
We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb
I
I truly appreciate everyone's input and advice.
I don't know that I have any advice, but what you're telling me is everything I'm fighting so hard against.
I work crazy hours at the hospital just so I can still have some kind of "stay at home mom" feel with my girls. Most of the time I think they're sick of me :)
My advice would be to find some kind of hobby that you're interested in and start doing it. Learn to ski, play bingo, join some kind of doggie club if you have one, go to the gym, go roller blading in the park.. do SOMETHING that is just for you.
When my husband left me I felt so ugly and worthless. I learned that I had to find myself again, and I kind of get that vibe from you that you need to find yourself again. I did it early in the split, and you're doing it later. I know this is going to sound so incredibly silly but one thing I did.. (lol I have to laugh) I got all fixed up one day and just started taking pictures of myself, and flipping through the pictures I was like wow, I'm not ugly, I'm not worthless.. I feel beautiful. Once I started feeling that way about myself again was when I was ready to start dating again.
Don't be afraid of the online dating stuff.. just be very selective of who you go out with. I spend weeks sometimes a month getting to know someone online and over the phone before a date, and most of the time the date still bombs lol. However, I'm comfortable on the dates.. I don't feel like I'm out with some psycho. I'm out with a nice guy seeing if there is any kind of spark.
Good luck to you.
and by then, it was too late."