Hmmmmm

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Hmmmmm
9
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:35pm

I wonder how you guys would feel about this. I really need NOT get my panties in a bunch over it really.


I may have mentioned that BE's (good) daughter just had her first baby two weeks ago. This is the daughter and son in law that is the Uber-High-Achiever. Very nice, reserved. We went to Italy with her and her husband last year. Had a nice time together.


Well, she emailed BE the baby pics and addressed the email to only him. Thats fine, because maybe she assumed (correctly) he would just forward them to me and share them. But then BE told me that he got a call from his ex gf "M" (no, not broom hilda... another ex gf that he was with on and off for 4+ years). M called to congratulate BE because his daughter emailed her with the pics. So she emailed her and not me. She never even lived with BE.

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:38pm
I would say that with you and BE being in the same house she may have consolidated by only sending one and assuming shared for the two of you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-15-2008
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:45pm
yeah - the envelope would bother me more than the email.

JH

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:49pm

I agree with Savannah, that since you two are living together she just sent ONE email/ letter to her dad's place assuming that you would see it as well... and may not have thought about adding your name to the email/ envelope since it would seem redundant...


And having a new baby is exciting- you want the WORLD to see your baby, right?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2006
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:51pm

Maybe I'm naive, but I don't think you should let it bother you.


I have friends who are couples and I kind of treat them like one person- if I send him an email, I know she will read it as well.

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 1:56pm
ok everyone says it's not a big deal, but I will play devils advocate. Any reason for any reason at all, did you all have a dispute or does she feel threatened by you or your DD taking away too much of his attention?
Just wondering, because I always address EVERYONE in the house when I'm writing to someone, even if it takes two lines. I don't want anyone feeling left out or I would at least put in the email: Hey, tell pacsun I said Hi.
Something.
That is just me and it would irritate me, but that's because I'm VERY etiquette conscious and some people just aren't.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 2:03pm

Thanks you guys.. I know she is just really busy. I was pretty overwhelmed after dd was born! It just makes me wonder a little since I am in her email address book. Would have been easy to include me. Oh well, I'll chalk it up to not being a biggie.


The baby is a cutie! I'll post a pic when I can :o)


pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 2:07pm

She had to send a separate announcement and email to BE's ex b/c she knew he wouldn't just share w/ her but will just share with you.

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Tue, 11-18-2008 - 2:16pm

I'm the same way, Cat. I address everyone in the home when I send a letter. (I bet it was either baby brain or maybe she did not know how to spell my real name...it is hard to spell)...


As for her and I, feel we get along fine, but she is pretty reserved. I am not as outgoing and as "M" was so she warmed up M better and easier. I remember one night in Italy that made me wonder if she accepted BE and I. We were at a pub and she said "well as long as you two are happy, that's all that matters." It made me think that she felt there were issues. I am quite a bit younger than BE, and there could always be that "gold digger" fear. Plus BEs exW (her mom) and all of his ex gf were both very skinny/waif like and tall...and I am petite with some curves. BE is tall so maybe she sees too many physical and age differences. BE is more social/outgoing than me.. maybe all of these things combined. But I have been nothing but nice to her, and we have never had any kind of disagreement so if she is unhappy with me I don't know about it!


I'll have to chill and just assume that she meant for me to get the pictures, too.


pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs



Edited 11/18/2008 2:18 pm ET by cl-pacific_sun
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
In reply to: cl_pacific_sun
Thu, 11-20-2008 - 10:52pm
It could be the baby stuff however I think it is kinda insensitive to leave you out. It is hard to blend families. Being the daughter in one that worked well it took time. I am sure that it was baby brain though. From what I have seen you are a warm and loving person.
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