he held my hand!!!
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| Thu, 11-20-2008 - 9:58pm |
hmmmmm..... MM and i are becoming something... after dinner he held my hand! Why do my instincts tell me that this was a huge step? Another huge step was I PAID for dinner.. okay so he didn't really order anything and it was my idea for him to join me.. but still most times he will pay. But this time he let me pick up the check and i offered to pay for his beer (seeing as how he really didn't order anything)... i felt like this was another major step forward.. right. And one last thing... he asked about meeting me or joining me at MY NEIGHBORHOOD BAR. He knows i like karaoke and since i'm always talking about it being right next to my house and all. My opinion, there's no way he's joining me at my neighborhood bar unless he's my boyfriend.. HA HA HA.. i know i know, i'll sleep with him before the definition but won't allow him into MY space without the definition. he he he .. but seriously, i'll be introducing him to ALL my neighbors and past flirts. a line has to be drawn somewhere , right.
anyway, i'm very extremely encouraged as to the direction of things. i think the only reason he hasn't had the "talk" is because it hasn't felt right.. ya know... don't want to force a conversation. i bet he's still unsure if i'm even interested in that kind of commitment (since i act very casual and all). i sense him leaning that way though and i sense him waiting for the right moment to bring it up. Anyway, i'm going to his place tonight.. of which i'm extremely looking forward to.. maybe it will come up.
I'll tell you what has come up again.. his first impression of me and how i keep impressing him the more he gets to know me. Because i'm so happy and bubbly, his first impression was that i wasn't so smart.. ya know, cuz ignorance is bliss. He found out that's not the case. I'm very intellegent on a lot of stuff and have wise opinions about many things too (tooting my own horn). Somehow, believe it or not, i give off an innocent impression.. as you all know, that's not the case. seriously, i wonder where that comes from.. i think it's just something in my smile that's innocent looking. let me attach a photo....
hmmm but that goes back to "what do I want?'... and am I ready for that kind of commitment? what would i expect? would anything change, with him, with me? hmmm i don't know. I hope nothing changes. I like things the way they are... the only thing lacking is the reassurance of exclusivity. maybe i'll just it up casually saying that i'm not interested in dating others and see if he feels the same. ??? i think if \ when that statement is true that i'm not interested in dating others is when the conversation needs to happen. Hmmm, is this true for me? Maybe not quite yet.. maybe i still need a little more time to know for sure if i'd want to stop seeing others, too. So with all that.... i think MM and I are moving in the right direction but not quite there yet... i'll keep you all posted for sure!
Loonybunny

oh let me clarify.. i mean when we walked from the restaurant to his car...
sure he's held my hand in the movie theater. when we're watching tv. when having nakie time.. but the walking and holding hands was new... something about that was special.
sorry, didn't mean to sound so confusing.
~Rebecca, Mom to Averey, 8 & Lotsa Labs!