Gobble, gobble - I was a turkey last w/e
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Gobble, gobble - I was a turkey last w/e
| Tue, 11-25-2008 - 10:31am |
Here's the good, the bad and the ugly update on me ;-)
First for the good
- got an unexpected check in the mail (escrow overpayment) woohoo - so no more worries about Christmas for my kiddos.... that was SUCH a relief

Dang, girl!! What a weekend!!
OK....I can relate to the wine confessions. BTDT, have had too much wine and have spilled my guts just like you did. It is survivable lol! But the next morning you do feel like crawling under those covers and NEVER coming out don't you?
I am glad you and Builder were able to talk. Sounds to me he understands you. His not talking to you might have been because you were worked up at the gatering and he did not know what to say at that point.
Also, it seems you two really know each others buttons. And that is normal in a couple...to realize each others buttons and then to learn to not intentionally push them. Builder knows that your button is being igonored. And you know that Builders button is jealousy/insecurity. In time you learn to work with these buttons to understand them and help each other grow. And I think you two are learning to do that.
As for the holidays, could you ask Builder if the two of you can have a small celebration together sometime before he goes?
I believe that sober or drunk, it is always better to tell and to know the truth if you are going to have a truly intimate relationship.
Ok... straight to the point: I don't think YOU did ANYTHING wrong here. The whole situation started because of Builder being a jealous jerk to you about mentioning the conference. He insulted you by insinuating that you are a slut that cannot be trusted- I'd be freaking mad too! So instead of apologizing to you for his behaviour he began to ignore you, which is more childish and jerk-like behaviour. No wonder his ex cheated on him: may as well do what you're being accused of all the time!
Sure, you didn't need to get drunk and try to go home, bad idea there. But the stuff you "confessed" wasn't bad in any way, you were being open and honest with him about how you were feeling, and you should never shy away from honesty: it truly is the best policy.
My biggest concern is your dismissing his jealousy and allowing him to pull that. I mean truly- talking to a guy at the mall and he's all over you for it? I mean, if you were sitting on the guy stuffing your boobs in his face, that would be one thing- but making a comment to a grandfather about his grandson?
So the question is WHY are you putting up with it?
Ugh! Booze does it every time! (((((hugs)))))
NOW ... onto BUILDER & his childish jealousy. I dont like it. ONE BIT. Its BULL.
Thanks for all the replies.
But I'm just stubborn enough that I'm not going to mention it.
" If he can't make the time to spend a few hours together, then so be it. *That* will tell me a lot too."
That's setting him up to fail :( You're putting him to a test without telling he's in the game- why do that? Why not just suck it up and say, "hey, I was hoping for some US time before you go away, what do you think?" I know it's EASIER to just say nothing, hope that he comes through for you and be disappointed that it doesn't happen... and then you'll be damning him for not "wanting" to spend time with you.
Ask him to spend some time, the worst he can do is say no, right? If he's too pressed for time, he's more likely to suggest another date/ time... and if not, at least he'll KNOW you want to spend time with him!