Starting slow...making progress...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Starting slow...making progress...
6
Sun, 11-30-2008 - 12:17pm

In advance I'll say, pardon my ramble....So I've been out on the weekends I don't have my kids lately. About six weeks ago I went out with a group of friends and felt invisible at the bar. That was fine, I was hanging back by choice...I'm not ready to date, I haven't dated in more than 10 years, my divorce won't be final until early 2009...but I felt like I needed to at least try to talk to people (read: men) for practice. You know, chatting them up and such.


So a couple weeks ago I did talk to a nice man...neurosurgeon in town on business. Nice enough but I swear I had a panic attack during the conversation. And my two girlfriends abandoned me and left me there to talk to him on my own...claiming "we thought you were into him." I even broke into a sweat.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Sun, 11-30-2008 - 4:33pm
Congrats on making progress girl!
Photobucket
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Sun, 11-30-2008 - 6:02pm
Ha! You sound like me. Congratulations on taking some initial baby steps... just practice, practice, practice!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Sun, 11-30-2008 - 7:32pm
It's weird, because I am not shy per se...I guess I just feel like I deal with kids all the time (both at home & at work) and it's what I know. I often feel like my adult brain (you know, the one that is capable of brilliant, stimulating conversation and such) is mush :) So yes, practice (to say the least) is what I need for a while.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Sun, 11-30-2008 - 9:20pm
The easiest place to practice small talk is the checkout line at the grocery store. Get used to just striking up conversations with people around you about anything and it will be easier for you to do it when you meet a cute guy :)
Winter Alison

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Mon, 12-01-2008 - 6:19am

Brilliant! Thanks Allison & all for the support & suggestions :)


~C

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Mon, 12-01-2008 - 7:53am

I know what you mean about the adult brain and adult conversation. I didn't even consider dating for the first year after my divorce because I really wanted to focus on my kids well being. Well, after a while, I could tell you all you needed to know about teen culture, but I couldn't hold down an adult conversation to save my life.

Practice your witty reparte on your friends for a while to get comfortable when you start meeting men. It does help.