Oooh he scored big points!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
Oooh he scored big points!
5
Fri, 12-05-2008 - 5:54pm

I made a joke with Irish on our first date (he counts our first date as my bday, not our coffee date.. he calls that "we just met" lol) that I'm the queen of 30 days or less. Its like there's something within 30 days that makes men run.. I think its reality hitting them upside the head that I'm a single mom, or just the reality of dating me.. I dunno what it is. Even Medic who seemed to drag on for months went sour within the first 30 days.


Anyway.. I was thinking yesterday ooh its been 30 days today... and of course nothing more has been said about it other than it just being a first date joke.


So... I just got a text msg from Irish "Its been 30 days and I still think you're amazing"


AWE!!!!!!!!!!!! Big points :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Fri, 12-05-2008 - 6:00pm
OK, 30 days. Done! Curse is over! Hooray!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Fri, 12-05-2008 - 6:47pm

That's what I was thinking....kiss the curse GOOD-BYE!! Yay on 30 days. He's a cutie for remembering and saying that :)


Is there still drama with his baby momma or has that calmed some? I hope so...he seems sweet.


~C

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
Sat, 12-06-2008 - 12:40am

Yes and no on the baby mama drama. He's set some limits and she's doing well with them. However still weird things come up like random cry fests, or when she tried to demand that she was going to the beach with him and the kids and that if he didn't let her she'd just show up and bang on the door. Sigh. Thankfully she didn't. She's has said that she accepts him dating now and moving on, but she says she does not know how to move on.


So.. although she does show her inability to grasp reality at times, she is still calming down a lot. She does not show up at his house anymore, or his families house, or beat on him, or threaten to contact me. Baby steps I guess.


So yah, sounds weird but we're making progress there, and I just kinda keep my nose out of it and let him tell me what he wants to tell me. He always starts with "you're not going to believe this" and I respond with "I don't think you can surprise me anymore" LOL.


And yes he is an awesome sweet great guy so far.. so I'm just trying to be smart about all of this and not put any pressure, keep it casual, and just be a good listener/friend.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Sat, 12-06-2008 - 5:25pm

Has anyone suggested counseling for the baby mama?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
Sat, 12-06-2008 - 5:35pm

Yah she's starting therapy.. wants him to go with her for the first one. He figures she just wants to be able to yell at him and vent it all out in front of the therapist. Hey, who am I to throw stones.. I don't see anything wrong with him going to 1 - 3.. he wants to go to none, she wants him to go to all. LOL.


I think that there in the beginning his head was just spinning on how to deal with her. He came to me for advice several times, and when he came to me for it I gave it. I never ever gave unsolicited advice for sure. But my advice basically was set the rules and make consequences for breaking them basically and thats what he's done. For example.. because she was unable to stop hitting on him flirty wise, and hitting on him abuse wise he now refuses to pick the kids up at her house until she begins to show restraint. They meet in a neutral zone. That was his idea not mine lol.. but based off the ok, I told you no more, and now here is the punishment. Who knows how long that will last.. but I thought that was a good consequence for her actions.. for now. I mean I think all of us are thinking hello! full custody! restraining order! lol... but that of course is the last thing anyone wants to do at this point.




Edited 12/6/2008 5:41 pm ET by trauma_junkie