Introductions
Find a Conversation
| Thu, 06-08-2006 - 1:20am |
Hello All,
I have been reading all of your posts with great interest for the past few weeks. And I couldn't help but wanting to get aquainted. I love the open-mindeness, caring and honesty. And mostly the eroticism!!!!
My SO and I are very sexually motivated; as most here seem to be. We have been exploring some new avenues (been together 2+ years)we have recently been doing anal and I've given her some very good spankings, she likes that!! She loves oral but I usually prefer ejaculating during IC and I haven't yet been able to ejaculate in her anally, I think because she is so tight. I would like to be able to release in her mouth more regularly and an anal release, I think, would turn her on a lot. I have had many lovers over the years and it has kind of always been my pattern to be motivated to C in their P.
Any advice for changing this pattern?
My other ? is this, she is very very hot sexually but has a hard time, being verbal during our love making; as far as what she wants etc., although she has verbalized that she is open to whatever I want to do. How do I get her to talk more about this?
I have had MMF and she has had FFM, she isn't open to that at this time, although I am. I do know that she is open to more experimenting. Do I just take matters into my own hands and expose her to some different things. I bought a Feeldoe and used it on her, as a dildo, but we didn't have a chance for her to try to use it on me, we were too busy doing other things to each other. We had discussed my buying this and she approved and doesn't seem to mind the idea of using it on me.
Just looking for any ideas to get the ball rolling.
Thanks in advance for your thoughts and time,
Jack

Pages
Welcome to the board!
I would just keep talking w/her about it...letting her know your interests w/out making her feel as if you are pushing them on her. Keep exploring new ideas and trying new things with her...I bet she comes around!
Hi Jack *waving*
Do you two read erotica together? That really helped us with expressing ourselves. It opened up a new line of communication and I'm so grateful.
Before? I'd hear a grunt and have to guess that my husband came. Talk about a turn off? OMG! But now, he knows as a result of the erotica? The nastier the better. He sees the effect it has on me.
Don't be afraid to ask her to be more vocal. Remember, she cannot read your mind.
I have tried hard to get her to talk during sex but she rarely says much. She has multiple O's and ejaculates big time, first time for me with a woman who does this every time. She O's with penetration, orally and when I use my fingers. She is absolutely awesome in bed. We have done some pretty taboo things outside in different settings, in the car, and elsewhwere. We both get a kick out of the idea of being seen and I think we have on a couple of occasions in the car, when she has gone down on me. She really likes me to cum in her mouth and I want to be able to do this for her more often. Are there any specific tecniques I could use to help me with this?
I think maybe reading erotica together might help her to talk. I've kind of tried to introduce her to this in the past but she just wants to get with the program if you know what I mean :)
If she's not vocal during sex, it's probably not going to change much unless she is holding back.
Ok, find a HOT story, print it out and hand it to her at dinner while you two are out.
Whisper in her ear that you want to act out this fantasy word for word. Even be so bold as to underline where the female character is talking dirty.
Then on the way home or to a hotel, mention something, in a loving way of "that is so hot when she said _____________________, will you do that for me baby?"
How could she resist?
Hi, Jack!
Thank You MK,
You are really very insightful.
"Did either or both of you engage in bi activities with the threesomes? Is that part of the goal?"
She has received only and I am straight. And no it isn't my highest priority as we have talked about it quite a bit and she has a lot of fear in that area although she told me I was free to be with two women if I wanted too. I wouldn't do that without her and she has made it clear that that won't happen. I don't know though because at one time she said she might give me that for a bday present. I'm not pushing it and rarely bring it up except to let her know that it is a fantasy thing only at this point and that I respect her feelings about it. And she knows I would never cheat on her as I know she wouldn't.
"What kind and what degree of experimenting? It sounds like she's interested in experimenting just between the two of you and no more?"
Correct, just the two of us, at least for now. What kind I'm not sure? I would like to talk to her about this but she hasn't been able to be specific up to this point.
I think maybe she wants me to take the lead? I don't know if I should ask her what she would like, tell her what I want, or just surprise her. She did get up the courage to let me know she would like me to take her anally and that she would be willing to use the feeldoe on me, hopefully we will get around to that this weekend. I have bound her wrists and given her some very good spankings which she likes a lot. And we have had sex in some pretty compromising places which is very exciting to both of us.
Thanks for your feed back and I will try some of the ideas I've gotten here from you and the others.
I think the communication issue is key. And like everything else; the hardest part is getting started :)
Pages