What stands between you and making yo...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
What stands between you and making yo...
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 9:31am

What stands between you and making your dreams happen?

  • I don't have the qualifications
  • I don't know where to start
  • I don't have the financing
  • I am afraid of failing
  • I am not sure it's a good idea
  • Friends and family say that it's a waste of time and/or money
  • Other (please explain)

You will be able to change your vote.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 9:52pm

Some dreams I do know how to achieve and just do it. Others I have no idea where to start, and that kind of overwhelms me especially if I need financial investment.

For those of you who don't know where to start, what are your dreams? Maybe we can help and support each other to jump-start our dreams!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-07-2007
Wed, 03-31-2010 - 11:34pm

I voted other. It's a combination of things. Like I would love to own a sucessful hotel/resort. But I don't have the money for that and haven't checked out financing. I would also like to write several number one bestselling "joy" books. But I have no idea where to start. I did check this out, but didn't get much info on how to start writing a book. As far as being a Pre-K teacher, I am partially qualified. I have one more test to pass, then I can enroll in the alternative classes and look for work.


"You'll find that life is still worthwhile, if you just... SMILE!"-Charlie Chaplin/Performed by Michael Jackson,The greatest entertainer and humanitarian



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sun, 04-04-2010 - 12:11am

Hey HotCarmel,

For both dreams, open up a file for each and start writing your ideas, cutting out photos that inspire you, adding photos of design elements or articles about hotels and resorts, etc. This will help you concretise your vision for the book, and hotel or resort.

After you've done that for the hotel, you have to choose a location, check out prices, add up all the costs and make a business plan. You'll also have to set up a company that will own the hotel. Ask around in the locations you want to own a hotel or resort whether there are B&Bs, inns, hotels, motels for sale. It'll give you an idea of how much businesses there are worth. If you want a bigger hotel or resort, what property owners usually do is that they work together with a hotel chain to manage it. They bring their expertise and manage the day-to-day; you are part of a chain which means that you are part of their sales & marketing campaigns not only with the general public but also with travel agents, airlines, etc. and you are also in their system in regards to reservations, etc.

For the book, start by writing down your ideas. Make an outline for your book, and write at least one chapter. You can already send out the the outline and the chapter to literary agents. Even if you don't use an agent, the outline is very important since this will help you stay on-course whilst writing, and it'll help the publishing house see where you want to go with the book.

The agent's job is to then sell your book to publishers. You only pay the agent when you've successfully signed a contract with a publisher and when you have been paid. The fee is a %. A lot of people prefer to go directly to publishers, who receive mountains of unsolicited manuscripts per year. Agents know the editors working at each publishing house, and their job is to personally sell your book(s) idea(s).

You might not need an agent if you are going through a smaller publishing house which specializes in a certain genre. You can also self-publish, too. There are companies that can help you self-publish, but this also means that you have to distribute the book yourself so that it gets sold in bookstores. Another way would be to go through a company like blurb.com, which allows you to self-publish a beautiful book but only in the quantities that you need (minimum is 1. I am not sure that the minimum is with traditional publishing in the US to make printing financially worthwhile).

What would also be worthwhile once you've completed the second draft is to hire a good editor to edit this draft and to help you write the third one and subsequent drafts until you have a polished and sell-able manuscript. I've read manuscripts that have basically not been properly edited at all and that had needed serious work on it. If I were an editor at a publishing house and I receive very similar manuscripts, guess which one I would pick!

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2001
Sun, 04-04-2010 - 3:40am
I voted other because, while $$$ do come into it, it's more a matter of time now. After all, at 67, there's not a lot of time left in my life to take on new reams...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2009
Mon, 04-05-2010 - 7:36am

I like this post.

Although, last time I posted on here that I needed help and Im all over the place, and Poppy really helped. I fell into a deeper depression, I am apparently STILL Married and the divorce isnt valid. Don't think I want to be divorced :( Anyhow, Ive had a lot of struggle, spiritually more than anything. Anyhow..this is a nice post. I really do need to plan and get on with it :)

I like the idea that you advised about getting a file and doing cuttings of hotels etc etc..Wow! tonight I am going to write and create my dreams and stick to them :)

Hmmm but to have a balanced and fulfilling life, shouldnt one look at all aspects. I.e. relationships, finance, health and well being, spiritual, charitable, career etc etc..What do you guys think and how do we reach our FULL potential and make our dreams reality in all departments?

Walk Hand in Hand with the Truth - It Will Set You Free
Walk Hand in Hand with the Truth - It Will Set You Free
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2009
Mon, 04-05-2010 - 12:32pm
When I cut out all the invalid excuses, for me it boils down to a fear of failure. That's an eye-opener!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2007
Mon, 04-05-2010 - 11:04pm
It's always money.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2009
Tue, 04-06-2010 - 11:16am
I stand between me and my dreams... I procrastinate, or have mental hang ups about whether or not I deserve good things...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 04-06-2010 - 9:00pm

If you weren't 67, what would you like to do, Carol?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Tue, 04-06-2010 - 9:49pm

Hello again, Goddess Victorious!

Human beings don't like change, even when they are craving change. We are very much creatures of habit, and even babies like and need their routines. This is one of the reasons why why experts will say to change only one or two things at a time and focus on these for a few weeks until these have become part of your routine and you aren't struggling or self-sabotaging yourself. After that, choose one or two new things to concentrate on and do the same.

It doesn't mean that you should only concentrate on just your career and forget anything else. It means that for each facet of your life that you want to change, to focus on one thing. It's great to have goals, and for people who are goal-oriented it helps making goals.

We also have to be honest with ourselves on how much we can take on at once. I know that I can't because I've got a lot of things going on in my life that are out of my control, and I've got to make space for these things when they do pop up. That way, even if things happen in my life that I need to make time for, I can still continue to work on my goals. Were I to have worked on too many things at once, many of them if not all would have been abandoned.

On the other hand, I've learned that working on one thing in my life will also affect the other aspects of my life, too. Last year I worked on my friendships and relationship. I just focused on that... but in turn that also influenced my work life, my emotional well-being, my social life.