Bit of a melt down yesterday

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2005
Bit of a melt down yesterday
Wed, 09-22-2010 - 4:08pm

This pregnancy was unexpected so I'm still coming to terms... not as much as when I first found out but still accepting none-the-less.

Part of my stress has been my husband.

-carrie  IAmPregnant Ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2006
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 5:04am

Hi Carrie,

sorry to hear that you're having a tough time. I know just what you mean, that having a stressed-out husband makes everything seem worse. When my DH gets upset and voices his anxieties, I wind up feeling like a boat without an anchor.

But, probably the best thing you or I could do (husband-wise) is to just bite our tongues and keep quiet and let him vent. Let him say all his fears, negative thoughts etc. and just be a quiet ear to him. Easier said than done!! Still, I think people in general, but spouses in particular, want to feel like they have the freedom to say whatever they want to say. In fact, probably just saying it takes some of the burden off your DH's shoulders. If you can accept his feelings without counterattacking (I'm not saying you did that), then I think it will help a lot.

As for the issues about possible birth defects, I think if you spend some time browsing thru this board you will see that many other forty-something moms have had similar worries that in the end didn't come to anything bad.

Good luck!