New Here! Hello!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2010
New Here! Hello!!
Wed, 09-15-2010 - 4:42pm

Hi everyone. My name is Kathleen, I am 31

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2005
Wed, 09-15-2010 - 7:20pm


I am sorry that you had to find us but this is a great place for support. I hope that your body is just recovering still and that you will be able to continue one with treatments. As far as the adoption saying I can relate. So many people think that is the answer to our problems. For one the emotions that we feel of being pregnant and wanting a biological child do not disappear and two adoption can be a long hard process. My parents keep telling me if it does not work out you can adopt. It does hurt. They mean well and they just don't understand the emotions since they have never gone through it.

Again I am sorry you are having to experience this. I will hold you in my prayers that it is not ovarian failure.

Me ~ 31

Me ~ 31  DH ~ 33  TTC #1 since August 2002. Dealing with mild Endo, PCOS, D

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2010
Wed, 09-15-2010 - 8:24pm

Oh Kathleen I am so sorry to hear you have to join us. I feel confident though that you will find the support you need. I know that I have found great support and friendship from these ladies that I cannot find in my regular relationships.

I am sorry to hear that the surgery did not fix your problem. I find it so insensative that people say you can just adopt. No one would say these things to other people with medical


"Even miracles take a little time." ~ Fairy Godmother: Cinderella

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2006
Wed, 09-15-2010 - 9:38pm

I am sorry for the trouble you are going through. I had a friend who had severe Endometriosis (stage 4) and she had surgery too. They also took her appendix out while they were in there. I know that her doctor wanted her to wait at least 3 months before trying after surgery. If you had your surgery in July it isn't even 3 months yet. Did your RE say anything about waiting?

***PG mentioned*******
My friend did get PG after her surgery through IVF. She did multiple IUI's and 2 unsuccessful IVFs before surgery. Now she is due in January.

I hope they can figure things out for you. You might want to look into Femara because that sometimes works when Clomid doesn't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2010
Thu, 09-16-2010 - 7:58am

Hi Kathleen,

I'm so sorry that you are struggling with IF and I hope that you find the support and friendships you are looking for here! I honestly don't know anything about ovarian failure, but I hope that your body just needs some more time to heal from the surgery. It does seem rather quick to be TTC... I have Endo as well and I understand the pain that comes along with that. Have you talked about trying anything other than Clomid? I did a round of Clomid last month and I didn't get any mature follicles on my right side, which is the only one with a tube. My RE put me on Gonal-F this month, any injectable, because it works better for getting follicles on both sides. Maybe you just need something a little stronger than Clomid? What about using donor eggs?

Yes, adopting is certainly not a solution that you can even accept right now and people need to be a big more sensitive to women with IF! One girl that I work with keeps telling me "I'd have a baby for you if I could...God knows I'm fertile". Boy, that makes me feel so much better! Try to keep your chin up and remember that there's a lot of treatment methods out there for us and something different may work for you. We are always here to listen to you and hopefully make you feel a little less alone!


TTC #1 since Dec 2009

  • Me - 30, DH - 35

  • Endo, possible PCOS, one tube, a body that hates me!

  • February 2002 - cyst removal, left tube severed, discovered Endo

  • June 2010 - ultrasound, no mature follicles

  • July 2010 - HSG, tube partially blocked and/or twisted.


Mom to 2-year old twin boys, Dawson & Devin

TTC #3

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2010
Thu, 09-16-2010 - 9:24am

Thank you for your kind response. What a week this has been!

My RE called back yesterday afternoon and told me that my estrogen levels at the time of my IUI were 545. He said that was very high and that tells him that I indeed had a mature follicle.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2010
Thu, 09-16-2010 - 9:35am

Thank you for your post!

You are right, my RE started me on Clomid almo st immediately after my surgery. I think we shouldve waited a while, but I was just to eager to get going that I never said anything.

My first IUI was in July and I did form 2 mature follicles at that time. My estrogen level then was 545. My estrogen level now is UNdetectable.

I was reading online yesterday (big mistake) about POF (Premature Ovarian Failure or Premature Menopause) and it was saying that if your FSH levels stay above 40 over 4 weeks, that you can usually conclude that it is POF. My level last week was 50 and my level yesterday was 79! I'm so scared that I am going into premature menopause!

I asked my RE about, why can't you just go in and get whatever eggs are in there and go from there?! He said that it doesn't work like that. I'm STILL confused over that!

I have thought about donor eggs, but to be honest...I have two step children and I dont think I would want another child that had my husband as it's father but someone else as it's "real" mother. Does that make sense or is that just crazy? As time goes on, my desire to actually be pregnant may outweigh my other worries, but who knows.

So much to worry about but I know i'm not supposed to worry.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2010
Thu, 09-16-2010 - 5:01pm

Hi Kathleen,
You've had quite the emotional roller coaster this summer. I certainly hope that your body just needs time to recover from the endo surgery. I'm sorry that you've been getting the "adoption" speech from people. My Mom says that to me now and then, but then she never had a miscarriage or difficulty getting pg. I don't know what costs are like in the U.S. but in Canada with my insurance coverage I can do at least 5 IVF cycles before I've spent what it would cost to adopt an infant. Plus I can do that a lot sooner than the 7 to 10 years it takes to adopt here. It's normal for us to want our own biological child, so you're not alone there.
I think you've picked a great place to come to learn, chat, vent and feel comfortable among others who definitely understand. Hang in there and feel welcome!

~ TTC since 2007
~ BFP May 2009 after 2nd cycle of clomid
~ MC July 2009
~ IUIs starting April 2010
~ Weak BFP April 2010

~ Meron born 12-09-11 after 3 1/2 years of TTC, IUIs and IVF.
~ #2 on the way(!) and due 06-06-13.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2009
Fri, 09-17-2010 - 11:10pm
Hello Kathleen,
I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles and set backs. Infertility is so traumatic with one blow after another and other people just can't comprehend what it feels like. I sincerely hope that you don't have ovarian failure and that your body is just recovering from surgery. I know it's always hard to deal with "what if's" and not having definite answers. I had pain from endometriosis for a whole year before my doctors would finally check it out. So I spent a year worrying about what was wrong and as month after month passed without conceiving if I would end up infertile because of the mystery pain.
And I totally sympathize about the adoption thing. People act like you can just walk down to a kid store somewhere and buy a baby for $100. They don't realize how expensive and complex the process is. Not to mention you still have to mourn not being able to have a biological child or experience pregnancy.
What ever happens the ladies here are great support and do understand.


TTC #1 since Feb '09

Unexplained Infertility: SA Sept '09/July '10


TTC #1 since Feb '09 with Unexplained Infertility: SA's all ok; b/w and HSG ok; Lap Mar '10 - mild endo on outside of right tube/uterus removed but not considered eno