a little better

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
a little better
2
Thu, 11-11-2004 - 5:46pm
After my venting here Monday night, I went to see my pdoc on Tuesday, ready to tell him I needed to take a leave of absence from my job if we couldn't get the hypomanic agitation under control (and I don't want to leave my job, although I admit that tonight I am dreading going in tomorrow - I only work PT - M-W-F). So he got rid of the Remeron and put me on a small dose of Risperdal as needed to get me through the week and then see what happens (he still plans to increase the Lamictal and start weaning the other antidepressants). Yesterday was the BEST day I've had in ages! I was still hypomanic, but the "happy productive hypomanic" that others described but I never had. Then today wasn't so good. But I did get a little more caught up with my paperwork. And I'm starting to accept the fact that I don't know when or if I will be able to function like I used to. Sigh. I thought that the year my SO died 4 years ago was the most challenging, but this one is getting up there!

peace and love,


just_a_big_kid


Sue

peace and love,

just_a_big_kid

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 11-12-2004 - 9:17am
Hey Sue...I'm glad you're feeling a bit better...I'm struggling a little myself right now after a brief period of "good". That's the only way I know how to describe it...I thought the depression was bad and it was, but this hypomanic/manic thing i keep cycling into is just as bad, well maybe not JUST as bad. I'm at work right now, with absolutely no focus...i can't sit still...i can't do anything...UGH. Anyway, I know I'm not much help, but I wanted to let you know I was thinking about you and glad you're feeling a bit better. Keep me posted, okay?

Hugs,

Keli

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
Fri, 11-12-2004 - 9:29am

Thanks Keli -


I so relate to your description of the cycling back and forth from depression to the "not so fun" hypomania. Today I'm not sure where I'm at, other than overly sensitive and emotional. I believe that things will eventually get better (or I wouldn't still be here!) but that's not helping me now. It's really hard to hold it together at work and with friends (all of whom happen to be AA's and most don't get the mood disorder). I just want to go away and hide for a month (preferably a sunny island - LOL) or so until this evens out, then come back to my life. Which I know isn't the answer, since this cycling may continue for awhile, I guess I have to learn how to live with it - which I don't yet.

peace and love,


just_a_big_kid


Sue

peace and love,

just_a_big_kid