Still having a hard time
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| Mon, 11-29-2004 - 10:44am |
All I want to do is cry and cry and cry. I am so emotional. I have been depressed now for over 6 weeks and going on 7 weeks now. My bf's dad died November 12th and that just made my depression so much worse. I thought of him like a dad. I cared deeply for him and now he is gone. I miss my brother who died November a year ago. I feel like everyone I love is dying on me. I have always feared my mom dying...but now I am even more scared. I can't lose her. Right now she is ok but in the past because of her emphysema she has had some close calls with almost dying. She gave up smoking so I think as long as she stays away from smoking she can stick around longer. I am crying now and trying to type this to you all. I hate this!!! It all hurts so bad. I am trying to be there for my bf also which is hard right now because I feel so bad and then I feel bad on top of that for feeling bad and having a hard time being there for him....Grrrr
My mom says I need time to grieve and deal with my stresses of dealing with my dd not going to school. I am trying to get her homeschooling but first I need a pdoc to say she emotionally is unable to go to school...we have an appointment Dec 6th with a pdoc. I wish I could just lay in bed and rest but my anxiety is so high it is hard to relax..ya know?
Any input on how to deal with grieving and anxiety? I could use any input and help that anyone has to offer.
Thank you
Tina~

Tina...I emailed you!
As for the anxiety, mine is HIGH too...I don't know what to do, especially when Ativan doesn't put me at ease enough to fall asleep. Staying busy helps...when I'm not busy with work, or talking with someone (typing actually, LOL) I feel like jumping out of my skin...I hate tosay this too...but ciggarettes help too...terrible, i know...but you asked! Breathing exercises I learned in the hospital help, but you can only deep breathe for so long, and then it doesn't help anymore...
Sucks, don't it?
k.
((((((Tina))))))
Honey, I am so sorry that things have gotten so bad for you over the last few weeks. I know it has to be rough as hell to deal with all of the stuff happening around you right now.
I only have one pointer for the anxiety ......
~The Worlds A Roller Coaster And I Am Not
Strapped In.