Have any of you finished college ?
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| Fri, 12-10-2004 - 1:32pm |
Just need to talk again,
Have any of you guys successfully graduate college? Was it hard for you?
I'm just having a down day. It feels like I'm always behind in my school work.
And it seems like I'm older than my classmates. You know, following the basic schedule you graduate from high school at 18 and get a bachelor's at 22. Well, I'm almost 24 (wish my happy birthday on January 24, I'll need it) and still have at least a year to go. What's worse is that, although I love what I'm studying, there is no use for just a bachelor's degree in family psychology. You almost have to have at least a Master's degree. But I know that when I graduate with a bachelors that's it for me and full time schooling for a while.
Not to mention that I keep having to fight red tape. Take last winter semester for example (January to April 2004). I did real poorly in a class for anxiety and depression reasons and have been trying this semester to get that grade changed to an incomplete. But administration refuses to. And I never get to speak to a person. I have to send in letters and petitions to an anonymous committee. I think that if I could just speak to an individual I could convince them that I need another chance at this grade. But I've heard through the grape vine that my school doesn't like to grant more than one petition per student. This means that since I've already had several petitions approved in the past to change grades and whatnot then I'm not likely to get any leniency in that area now. And if I can't get at least a C average then I get denied federal aid which pays for my tuition. So, that means I now owe the university 2,000+ dollars because they wouldn't let me get financial aid for this current semester because of my grades from last winter semster. It's so screwy. And if I can't pay off that then I can't enroll for classes next semester. I face this kind of stuff all the time. I don't understand why there has to be so much burocracy. I hate having to always make excuses to teachers and administrators about why I messed up this time. Sorry, I just didn't have enough energy to leave my apartment and walk a couple blocks to school in the sleet. Maybe this works once, but when I keep having different reasons - well, I think it's gotten old.
I want so badly to graduate. I want to be able to help people and have a profession, not be a professional bagger at Target. Is there any light at the end of the tunnel?
Thanks for your support, everyone. It's nice to have a place to come and share our stories and troubles and the good times too. I'm sorry that I've needed encouragement more than I've been able to give it lately.
~Beth

Beth:
You are doing AWESOME! Recently, I heard a report on the news that although 10 years ago it took an average of 4 years to get a bachelors degree, it is now taking an average of 6-8 years. You are right on track sweety!! :)
Personally, I went to a business school when I was 28, busted my butt like crazy and got my associates when I was 30. It was horribly hard, even though it was a slacker school and I have never done anything with the degree. I just am proud of the fact that I actually got it. Some day I will go back and get my bachelors.
Tracey
Hi Beth, my name's Beth also. :)
I graduated in '99 with a Bachelors in Music. By the seat of my pants, I might add. But it can be done. I think it was my hypomanic episodes that really got me through. The times I was super productive kept my GPA high enough to graduate, and my profs were a bit more understanding because they knew what I could do when I was "on". Typical artist/musician BP case. It was a small program, and everyone knew each other pretty well, so that helped a bit.
I had semesters where I was depressed and ones with mania or hypomania. I dropped out of my major for a year, then took a million classes in one semester to make up for it. It was tough in music, because there was a lot of performing, and my anxiety level was sky high. It is also impossible for me to practice (piano) when I am depressed.
Since a major episode of depression a couple years ago, my music career went kaput. I started going back to school for accounting (of all things!). When hypomanic this summer, I registered for Statistics (I was feeling REALLY good back then :) LOL) BIG mistake, because now I am in the grips of the depression that follows the good times. I basically blew $700 on this class because I can't even get myself to it, never mind comprehend and pass.
So, that pretty much sums up my higher education. One word - ROLLERCOASTER. I'm all over the map, and don't have a clue what I'm doing right now.
I don't know if this helps at all. But I graduated, and never believed I would make it either.
Take care!
Beth
Beth,
It IS possible to get a degree with BP--'cause I got one!
Yep, sure have, but it took me about 10 years (from the age of 19 until 28) while working full-time.
Beth,
I'm in the same boat. I'm 22 and will be starting my senior year next semester - after the end of that year, I'll still need to go at least one more semester to get all of my credits to graduate (probably 2 more, though). I can only take 4 classes per semester (while some of my friends take 6!)...otherwise I have a total melt down. I figured out early on that I just couldn't handle a full course load. I'm still "full time", but just doing it in smaller steps than everyone else. My advisors and professors are always giving me a hard time about it, and telling me I should take at least five courses, because I'm a very good student - but I know myself, and I know my limits. I get through and do well by getting way ahead in things when I'm having a good week. I also focus 100% of my life on school - if I'm having a good week energy wise, I'll stay home all weekend to get ahead in a class, rather than going out with friends. It's hurt me socially and I get lonely....but it's the way I have to do it.
I'm starting to get nervous about the fact that my scholarship was only for four years - so after I finish two more semesters, I have to pay full tuition (almost 22k a year!!) just because I've taken longer. But I never would have finished if I had taken on a full load, so I guess that's just how it's going to be....hopefully I'll get a good job and be able to pay off those loans eventually. :-\
So hang in there - you'll get through.
-Jessica
Hi, new here, but I can totally relate to your post.
I am also almost 24 and have what seems like forever to go. The neverending university story. I'm in my 4th year of a 3yr program and hope to get a second degree after this one and then teachers college. That's at least 2 more years. I also have to face the fact that my grades suck and yes people generally don't care about the person behind the number. "Hi I'm 0160520 nice to meet you". I did find a prof who actually cares about me. I was so shocked. We both were at the campus bar in the summer semester (I had just finished an exam) and she said "Hi. I was thinking about you and wondered if you were ok". I ended up telling her that I was manic depressive. I haven't told many people before and only those very close to me, never someone so far removed as my prof. But she had already seen the bandages on my wrists last year and I would be seeing her again this year for the same course that I failed last year. I am learning not to use my illness as a crutch and say give me credit because I'm ill or it's not my fault it's the depression. I handed in my assignment for this class late and told her that it had been quite a week. I was at my most manic and that's when the productivity goes nowhere because my brain is so scattered, luckily I had my notes done on the articles I was using before this point, but I don't think I even used them because even they didn't make sense at that time. So when I handed it in I said this is what is happening but I'm not using it as an excuse and I dated the paper honestly and you can take off the percentage per day. (She didn't - she said she really didn't care as long as it was in by friday). We talked a couple times about my university career and this course. She said I can't fail this course if I do the work. It was hard but I just handed in my last assignment for that class and there is no exam. I've also seen a counsellor (well once, but that's another long story) and he gave me the task of remaining goal oriented no matter what phase I'm in. I didn't even realize it but I hadn't been doing that and now (although it is tough) I'm trying really hard and hope to graduate from my first degree in the Summer.
Sorry it's so long but I've never had a chance to talk to anyone about this. I've never known anyone else who was manic depressive before and really didn't know that's what I was until fairly recently.
Anyway I guess my advice is to remain goal oriented no matter how you feel and try not to lean on the disorder as a crutch.
Thanks for listening.
Schitz