Sorry to bug y'all again...-Triggers!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Sorry to bug y'all again...-Triggers!
5
Wed, 12-22-2004 - 10:06pm

...........but I just don't know what to do anymore.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 9:40am

Hey Traci!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 10:10am

hi Traci -


I keep a mood chart and definitely had days that started "up" (often with a lot of agitation), then by late afternoon I've crashed into a deep depression. Very frustrating.


I belong to a 12 step program, and although it is helpful, I need medication and therapy also in order to function. Unfortunately, there are a lot of people in my program who think my "disease" is JUST alcoholism and that ALL of my symptoms are because of that and even though I don't drink, I must not be working the steps hard enough. Even my sponsor alluded to that last night - that the disaster of my apartment, my feelings of unworthiness, etc are all because I haven't fully surrendered to the disease and program. And I just didn't have the energy anymore to try to explain that with a mood disorder, sometimes the apartment doesn't get cleaned because of my depression, and because i have ADHD also, it has NEVER been in order - it is just far worse right now. I feel like I should just keep my

peace and love,

just_a_big_kid

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 11:44am

Hi Foggy,

Wow...Just goes to show that this disease is not for cowards!

I'm sorry you're swinging so rapidly and so hard. All that stress I'm sure doesn't help. I wish I could ride in on a white horse, sweep up your Mom and take her to a twelve step program. As a 12 stepper, I know that's not possible but, I would do it if I could. We do so much damage before we get help...if we get help. I admire you for going to alanon.

I know what you mean about not wanting to be strong sometimes. There are times I want that to be someone else job for a while. That doesn't make me weak...just human.

I have no words of wisdom for you...just much love...

I'm glad you posted and hope you keep posting anytime you need to. You helped me know this is a safe place to go.

Love,

Jamie

Love,

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2003
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 7:27pm

OMG !! Sue, I went to an open meeting for Dual Diagnosis Anoynomous and a lot of the members said the same thing about AA. Their "friends" and sponsors said the exact same thing, they weren't working the steps. They can undersand alcoholism as a disease, but depression just doesn't fit. A DDA meeting would be the way to go, they all have a substance abuse problem and mental illness.

Kristin

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 10:44pm

Kristin -


I've been looking for DDA or DRA meetings in my area - there are no DDA but there are a couple of DRA (Dual Recovery Anonymous) downstate, which would be worth the drive for me if they are on days that i can make it. Because i desperately need some support from people who understand. Thanks for bringing it up. I was looking into it a couple of months ago, then put it aside. Now I REALLY need it!

peace and love,


just_a_big_kid


Sue

peace and love,

just_a_big_kid