Jealosy??
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| Tue, 09-21-2010 - 1:04pm |
AP and I haven't had a good heart to heart talk in a long time. I think we really need one because I am ready to throw in the towel at his behavior. Our week has come where we are supposed to end the physical. It worked out that we can't get together much anyway so I don't even know if it'll happen. He seems to be pushing me away lately, I think it's his way of making it easier on both of us. At first we were going to stop all the talking but now he wants to keep that up.
It really bothers him that my dh phones me so much during the day. He seems to think it's to check up on me, but my dh and I have always talked lots and we both have a lot of down time during the day when we just chat. AP is annoyed that dh is going to be phoning me while I am with him and what's to know what I am going to tell him I am doing. He threw in there that I am not going to be able to enjoy my time with him because dh will be phoning. He doens't want me to leave my phone in the vehicle either, yet I know if dh phones while I am with him it's going to spoil the whole time together.
AP has told me he's in over his head, I really don't know what to think anymore. I just want to go back to being friends like we agreed, I know we can do it, that's not an issue. I think the stress of this week and the expectations is too much for both of us. We have some things planned in the next two days, I guess we'll have to see what happens. We both know a talk is coming, I guess I'll have to make sure not to hold back.

Hi Another,
I don't think AP should be upset because you and H talk alot during the day. After all he is your H. I think he's jealous of the time & energy he sees you putting into H and is distancing himself because he feels hurt. I think with the feelings that you and AP have and after being physical that being friends afterwards will be very hard. In fact I'm not sure if that can happen at all without you both being caught up in the cycle again. I can be wrong, all couples have there own dynamics but to me it can be a bit challenging.
I don't think your AP should worry so much about H calling you and he should just focus on enjoying the time he has with you. I'm sure you know how to handle the situation when he calls. We have to live for the moment, for what we have right now. He can't keep stressing something that hasn't happened yet, it will ruin the day.
Wishing you well!
Much peace & Love,
Rayne
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Thanks Rayne! We'll never go back to "just friends" There will always be something there. We get along so well and have the same interests and hobbies and of course there is always the flirting. I'm not sure how long it will last for but I'm willing to give it a try. He can't handle the guilt I don't think of the physical end of cheating, I don't think he realizes what an emotional affair is.
Last night's chat didnt' go well at all but we did manage to have a quick chat this afternoon. He is really looking forward to our time together tomorrow. So much gets lost in typing with emotions and miscommunication. I think knowing what is coming up is causing him stress, but it was his choice. I guess I'll find out in the next couple of days when we are together.