Why am I still surprised? Long :0)
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 10-06-2010 - 9:44pm |
Hi everyone! So happy the board is back, although I'm not really sure that I'm liking the "upgrade" yet. Hopefully I'll get the hang of it soon and it won't feel so unfamiliar.
I had a great week working for AP last week. He invited me out to dinner a couple of the nights, and he let me know that the quality of work I was doing was very good....which I appreciated. There were a couple of nights where I went home, and he went home....not a problem whatsoever. Then Friday arrived.
It was payday, and the guy that was also working for AP left about an hour before we did. On his way out the door I heard him say to AP, see you soon....by which I assumed meant see you at the bar. I had already assumed that he would go, he usually does....what I didn't expect was to not be invited! I told him I was going home, and after stopping to see my landlord...that's what I did. I mean after all, what vibrant, good-looking, single

Hi Benska, Sorry youre having such a hard time. I agree with you that there is alot of childish high school behavior going on there. I hope everything settles down for you soon. Do you have friends you can go out with and just relax and enjoy being out and having fun? A few good girls night outs is what you need!!!
I don't really know if it's because I'm just so afraid of being alone that I put up with it, or if it's because I really do love him...in which case to me, that means loving the warts and all. The latter of course, is the story I tell myself more often :-(
As far as going out with girlfriends, I do that on occasion, but they are mostly occupied with their work & families. Also, right now I don't have the money for a girls night out (when I talk about going to the pub, I never have more than 2 and/or my AP buys). Also, for some reason we end up talking about my problems, even though I try hard not to get on to that subject.
Until I'm ready to let go of this R, this absolutely joyful and sometimes infernal R that is going absolutely nowhere, I really have no right to complain. I do wish I didn't let him get to me. I would love to be calm, cool, and collected....I know for a fact that it would totally freak him right out. I bet you the squirrels would start scurrying in his head!
I think I learned this weekend that I do have the ability stop myself from doing something I know I shouldn't, such as texting him when I should just go as cold and as silent as he does. That's what I have to remember, with all that I am, the next time he pulls this. I also know that it's a matter of when, and not if, he pulls this kind of behavior again.
Oh yeah!!! I'm sick that I forgot, but I did have a lovely day last Saturday. My son and his family...which means my granddaughter :-) came to town and had an old family friend, who's also a photgrapher, do some candid shots of them in the fall colors (I live in the mountains). He invited me to come along and get a shot done with the baby, well...she's actually more like 2 1/2 now, so I did. I went back to my friends studio with her where I got to see the pictures a little better, and there were some pretty good shots....and at least one really good one of the two of us! I am very excited about that and can't wait to get one that I can frame for my dresser :-) She's so darn cute, and it made me feel extraordinarily good when it was clear she knows/remembers who I am. Unfortunately I don't get to see her as often as I wish I could.
It ain't all bad.
benska
I'm so happy you got to see your granddaughter!
You've got a lot of choices. I
Oh Im betting those candid pictures are lovely!
At least now I know that she hasn't forgotten her Nana!
I think, out of what I saw, I like the one where the three of them are walking/skipping away from the camera...all holding hands :0) So sweet