This just sucks!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
This just sucks!!!
Fri, 03-25-2005 - 3:01pm

Starting the 22nd of this month (3 days ago) I am celebrating my 20th anniversary with my dearest friend. We live in seperate states and I miss him terribly. I could really use a hug from him. I love him, but we are only friends, but 20 years is a long time. He deserves a combat medal to have stuck beside me this long.

SO.....I was suppose to clean for the retired doctor this weekend and they canceled on me, which sucks because I was really depending on the money. Now I'm f'd. I really do need that money and it is 75.00. I could really charge them more, but they are retired.

Tonight I'm going home and I'm drinking the rest of the BudLight in my fridge. OK, I'll cook something and then drink. But I intend on celebrating 20 yrs, but I was going to go to dinner with a friend and he was going to go to dinner w/a friend and it was the same restaurant, diff towns. I know it sounds fruity, but it was sweet. Now I have no money and my best friend says he'll just look up at the moon at a certain time and I'm to do the same thing. That way we're together in spirit.

I know it doesn't sound like much to cry over, but I'm so lost. My heart is broken and it hurts so darn bad. 20 years, most marriages don't last that long. Neither of ours did. LOL, however, he has two beautiful sons from his marriage and all I got was scares and bruising.

Well..I have 1 hour left here, then I'm going home, eating something quick, then I'm getting drunk. I know I shouldn't...but I am!

Happy Easter to you all.
Carla