Thanks, kinda scary update from pdoc...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thanks, kinda scary update from pdoc...
3
Fri, 04-08-2005 - 12:56am

I want to thank you all who encouraged me to call my pdoc earlier this week...as odd as it may sound, that idea hadn't even occurred to me! (guess that shows how well my depressed brain is working...).

I did force myself to go to the doctor-shadowing session I had scheduled...I honestly didn't think I'd make it through without breaking down in tears...but in a very nice coincidence, this normally extremely busy doctor was having such a slow day that he sent me home after about an hour...I'm supposed to go back to shadow him another time.

I'm still supposed to go talk to patients at a nursing home tomorrow...I still can't imagine I'll be able to do it, and I was supposed to do an assignment beforehand that I haven't managed to do...

Oops, was going to update about the appointment. I was honest about things, and my pdoc recommended that I try ECT, and as soon as possible. This kind of shocked me, but my main worry was having my mom "freak out" when she heard because she's always been very wary of the idea.

But I did call my mom, and she was surprisingly supportive...she's still quite worried about it, though, and is trying to find more info on ECT to help decide what to do...I didn't tell her that the pdoc is going to try to get me in next week (as an outpatient).

So lots of concerns still about the ECT (although I guess it might not be such a great thing that the idea doesn't scare me too much, since I honestly don't care what happens to me...not good). The hospital said it might be 10 days before I could get seen, and my pdoc said that seemed like a long time, and that I could go inpatient for 2 or 3 days to get a quicker start...but I don't think I'll do that, especially because of my mom.

OK, sorry to post once again...I feel so bad for putting my parents through this seemingly endless cycle of stress and financial burden and everything...then again, I feel bad about everything...maybe that will change someday.

Thanks again,

Rose

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
Fri, 04-08-2005 - 9:42am

Rose:

Don't apologize for posting again! :) It's great that the shadowing went well, and I'm sure it was a relief that you were sent home early, considering your mood.

I'm happy that your pdoc is taking your condition so seriously! I know ECT seems really terrifying (images of movies flash through MY mind when I think of it), but it is a lot different now then the "One flew over the cuckoo's nest" days. I know there are others here on the board who have looked into it or discussed it with their pdocs. I'm sure someone will have some insight on it for you.

I'm glad you talked to your mom too. I know when I finally discuss what is going on with me with my mom, she is usually relieved that I am aware of it - she can see a LOT more then I realize but never is comfortable approaching me on it.

Take care!!
Tracey

Avatar for schitz
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2004
Fri, 04-08-2005 - 12:45pm

(((Rose)))

I'm glad things weren't quite as awful as you thought they would be ;) (they never *really* are, are they?)

I have faith in your abilities with the assignments and practicum. You have proven to be smarter and stronger than you give yourself credit for.

If you do choose ECT I hope it works for you. I've heard it's good for those struggling with resistant depression. Good luck! I think you need to stop worrying about your parents stress and finances, it seems you are putting the burden for 100% of that on yourself, and it's not your fault.

Lots of hugs! Love,

Amanda

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Fri, 04-08-2005 - 2:19pm

Hi Rose:

I don't have anything to add, except I'm glad you posted and big ((((((((((Rose)))))))))).

Rowan