AP does not really want to ever end this ....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2010
AP does not really want to ever end this ....
3
Sat, 10-09-2010 - 11:26pm

Hi MASers,

Just to recap.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2010
Sun, 10-10-2010 - 4:36am

these situations do have a shelf life, but then some can last for years. it just depends on what u want, what u can deal with and how great of a guy. lover, friend he can be to you. if neither one of u expects to change the other's home life, then you will have to deal with him being married and the family trips, couples vacations, etc.... good luck. you will really have to know yourself, and whatu want when pursuing this sort of extra-curricular activity.

when one does not love too much, one does not love enough --blaise pascal
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2010
Sun, 10-10-2010 - 8:22am

Hi flylady,

I have never had to experience my AP going away on vacation with a wife, seeing as he has been divorced ever since Ive known him. But he does get away with friends, both women and men, albeit, never just one woman. He gets away with these friends in groups. There might be 3 women, 2 men, or 4 men one woman, it just depends which of his friends are available for trips at the time he goes. He is always doing something! At first it bothered me that he went away with his friends, esp. if the majority of the group were women ( one especially who is very pretty IMO) but I had to accept that he has another life apart from his life with me, just as I do.

He has always accepted that I get away with my H, sometimes alone, other times with the stepkids, but still he has to accept that this is part of my other life. We dont talk much about the time apart, we try to focus on the 'us' time. I dont divulge what happens on my trips with H, whereas he does tell me everything that goes on in his trips. I think he feels like he needs to ( not because I have asked him to)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Sun, 10-10-2010 - 10:32am

Hi Flylady,

It's completely up to you about staying or leaving.

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