Update on me (trigs)

Avatar for missyflanders
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Update on me (trigs)
2
Sat, 04-09-2005 - 6:23pm

I am still a mess. I am so depressed. I blew off school part of the day yesterday and slept through part of one today. I just could not wake up. Dh is annoyed that with the meds I have seen no improvement. I am having vivid dreams/reality/I don't know what that scare me for I don't know why (not scary things I am visioning). They are just when I am falling asleep so I don't go to sleep. I have been up until 2 that last two nights then waking up at 5 with the kids. So, I am even more tired. I have been crying every day. I am nauseus. I am on an antibiotic for some post nasal drip that has been making be sick for several weeks. I ended up near a panic attack feeling like I could not breathe. I can not wait until Monday to talk to the doctor. I plan on calling on Monday to try to get her to see me before the 19th. I can not live like this and am scared for myself and my family. In my visions, I am constantly yelling at my kids and family and they seem sooooo real. I thought it was storming out and it was not. I could not even tell which room of the house I was actually in. At one point, I think I was really screaming out of fear, which I don't really understand. I am afraid that is some kind of psychotic episode, which I never have had before. I am seriously considering the out patient program at the hospital that the hospital referred me to. I just can't work out school, daycare and the move if I am gone for 5-10 mornings. Plus it would cost us about $1000. Ugh. Gonna go stop my fighting kids.

Missy

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2003
Sun, 04-10-2005 - 11:11am

Missy --

As a fellow newbie -- hang in there!

I hope that your pdoc will be able to see you sooner and that you have some peace and tranquility at night (and the rest of the time too).

Cheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Sun, 04-10-2005 - 10:21pm
I'm so sorry your having those terrible dreams. I was having them for awhile and got put on a new medication which stopped them. If somehow you can afford it I would recomend the out patient program. Having gone from the hospital to partial hospitalization program to the out paitent program. I got a lot from the partial hospital and the out patient program. I actually felt kinda silly because a lot of the stuff I was being taught I knew because of my degree. It was a good refersher and it was great to talk face to face with others going through the same thing. Having daily therapy was nice although it did take a little while to adjust to group therapy. I'll stop my rambling. I also hope you can get in soon to the pdoc sooner than the 19th.
Vista

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