Alone, Depressed and Scared
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Alone, Depressed and Scared
| Fri, 04-29-2005 - 12:17pm |
I know you all don't know me, but I'm scared right now and I don't have anyone to talk to. My name is Jena. I am Bipolar and right now I am very depressed. I have been having thoughts of cutting myself. I'm so tired. I have been wearing a rubber band around my wrist and giving myself a good pop with it when I feel like cutting myself so I don't do it. I have been playing the What If game in my head for days now....what if my parents die...what if someone breaks into my house and something bad happens to me....what if my dog or I get attacked by another dog. Stupid, huh? I have been on muscle relaxors for 2 weeks because my back went out. I started having problems right away. I feel manic and depressed at the same time. I think it has that has something to do with it. I've been trying real hard to keep myself busy, but I'm so tired. I called my pdoc and she wants to see me tomorrow. I'll be glad once my Dad gets home. I don't want to be alone while I'm going through this. I live with my parents and they are real supportive. I'm just so scared. I can feel myself start to spin out of control and I don't know what else to do until I see my doc tomorrow. Please say a prayer for me. I appreciate you listening to me ramble...

Hi Jena...I remember you!
hello jena, this is valerie. im sending you lots of love and hugs and prayers. ive BTDT except i pull my hair out. things will be better tomorrow. good luck with your visit with your pdoc. i know how it feels to be lonely, just know your NOT alone and we're here with you and for you.
valerie
Bless your heart. It's wonderful that you have a support system around you.
The folks here on the board are very helpful and considerate.
I pray that you will get help from your pdoc soon.
Jena, how are you doing today? With BP, it's especially important to try and take things day by day. Seriously. Don't try to skip ahead and start worrying about tomorrow. Just focus on putting one foot in front of the other to get through today. Like in "What About Bob"....Baby steps.... How did your pdoc appointment go? Was she(?) able to help you? Are you on any medications at all? Is that something you've discussed with your pdoc? The right medications, if that option is available to you, can really make a huge difference in how you are able to deal with each episode. They will always happen, so a great support system (like this one!) is really important!! I hope you feel welcome here to vent and seek out help and support. That's what we're here for and I think we're pretty good at our job. (If we're not, let us know.)
Lots of hugs your way! (((((((Jena))))))) Please let us know how you are doing and what's been going on since you last posted. Especially when you're feeling antsy but depressed (called a mixed episode), it's important to stay grounded in the present, in reality. That's where we can help. Take care!!
...Days til we meet Zoe!

...Days til we meet Zoe!
