Hi all!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Hi all!
6
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 11:45am

Hi everyone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
In reply to: keli003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 11:53am
(((((Keli))))) You truly are an inspiration. We are all blessed to have you.
Love and Hugs!!!!
Carla
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2004
In reply to: keli003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 1:02pm
I'm very jealous! lol Mabye someday...

Jodie

Avatar for schitz
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2004
In reply to: keli003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 2:33pm

Wow Keli! So great to hear you say that. I can "hear" the difference in your voice.

As far as myself, I'm just really frustrated with all this. Things are moving slowly, it feels like going nowhere. Partly because pdoc wants to wait until she reviews her notes before changing anything and she figured that would be 2 weeks, but the next available appt was 6 (last time it was 4...seems they are getting farther and farther apart).

Funny you should mention staying on meds. I doubt I mentioned this because i haven't updated in a long time, but my pdoc wants to taper me off EVERYTHING! She hasn't seen me off meds and wants to and thinks I'm on too much (oh please! I have a lot less than most people. My doc rx'd the wellbutrin and epival (one AD and one MS I don't think's too much) and Ativan for anxiety (originally lectopam for getting to sleep but pdoc took me off that and I've been taking the Ativan for that too). It was the pdoc who added trazodone to the mix for sleep. Not for getting to sleep but for staying asleep. Whatever. I didn't think that was a problem. I think I'll stop that one.

My doc says I know my body and if it's working or not. But really I don' think so. I have other people telling me if I look manic or depressed (like dr pdoc and tdoc and friends) personally I don't feel either. I'm pretty flat and apathetic. Yes it's kind of in the middle (maybe leaning toward depression), but definately not normal or stable. Or is this the best I can hope for?

I do like that I'm past the side effects on these meds and if I come off them I'm going to have to go through withdrawl and then new side effects with new meds. Don't like that idea.

My friend suggested lithium is probably right for me. I can't stand the thought of gaining any weight though. I already gained with the epival (depakote)

Well, sorry to post a negative to your positive.

Amanda

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2003
In reply to: keli003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 3:01pm

Amanda:

I don't think it is all that uncommon for a dr to take you off all meds, and fortunately not all meds have a withdrawl factor.

One a positive note for you - I don't remember gaining any weight when I went on Lithium. For a while there, I had lost weight while on it. The only time in the past year I HAVE gained weight is when I didn't take meds for a bit (LONG story). Once I went back on them (I am on 900 mgs lithium, plus ambien as needed for sleep) the weight gain stopped and I THINK I am starting to lose again.

Review with your pdoc if any of your meds will cause a withdrawl (they can be UGLY) and also what checks will be in place in case you go off deep end, so to speak, without your meds. This could be a good step for you. Once the meds are purged from your system, they can start from scratch and HOPEFULLY get you on the right mix.

Good luck!
Tracey

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
In reply to: keli003
Fri, 05-27-2005 - 7:31pm

(((((Keli)))) Kudos on the good vibrations. i glad things are rosy for ya. im hoping it will rub off on me! i actually had a pretty good week myself. a little mania but not bananas mania.

my surgery date looms ahead and im so excited! i hope after all this is over i'll be as happy as you are now. i too am on lithium and have gained *alot* of weight. im not gonna worry about it, i'll lose it after my surgery! oh did i tell you im having surgery?? LOL!

doing pretty good with the non smoking thing. slipped up once (had one! hangs head in shame) but im back on the wagon and not looking back! see how your joy is contagious! i cant even complain im too happy for you to bother.

may the good times continue to roll and god bless girl

valerie

Avatar for schitz
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2004
In reply to: keli003
Sat, 05-28-2005 - 2:38am

Thanks (((Tracey)))

I sure hope you're right. Everyone always warned about gaining weight on epival/depakote, which I did, but also not much and managed to lose half of it without trying. Once I realized that I was overeating and put a little control on, I lost about 10lbs in about 2 weeks and plateaued there. Unfortunately I'm back to whatever I want when I want, and believe me it's not that I'm hungry! I'm surely gaining again (ugh). willpower willpower willpower.

The other big thing that I'm really hating is that my 2week follow up appointment can be scheduled no sooner than 6 weeks. I really don't want to be going 6 weeks while I'm tapering.

As for having a plan when I'm batty and you need to scrape me off the ceiling, she doesn't agree with the bipolar dx I think, so i'm sure she thinks i need nothing. Also maybe the real reason she wants me off meds?

Man do I feel like a lab rat. There for her experimenting with meds, not listening to how i say I feel or even previous dx's.

Okay gonna go now. I'm not sure if I'm going anywhere with this.

Still wish *I* knew how I feel and how fast I am going and coherent I seem. But then again, I went into the hospital I fooled them into believing I was coherent where now I know next to nothing of it. (so maybe I can't get the truth from others either).

Love and hugs,
Amanda




Edited 5/28/2005 3:07 am ET ET by schitz

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