Update on me

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Update on me
6
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 5:20pm

Well.....it happened. He got married and he lied straight to my face Thursday evening. He said he was moving out and that they were through. He is a ________!!! Fill in the blank. He is pitiful. LIAR!!!

I told you all he brought my VCR back, well there was a tape in it. OF THEM!!!! I got a good look at her and they way she was mouthing me and I turned it off before they got naked and I threw it away, but not before I took it in the garage and beat the thing to death with my wiffle bat. NOW I need a new bat. I'd like a steel one to put against their heads. She was seeing him long before we split, the tape proves it. I'm livid.

My b/f says to just move on. I can't. I'm jealous!!! It took her under a year (they've only suppose to be seeing each other for 8 months) to get him snickered into marrying her, it took me 7 years, and I begged. I'm the pitiful one here.

Tdoc was NO HELP!!! Neither was Pdoc!!! People don't understand that mental abuse stays for EVER!!!!!!!! My bruises and broken bones are healed, his words still sting, even ones he said 12 years ago. I don't know what to do. I know I'm better off, I don't want him, but WHY do I still feel this way. He's out of my heart, I just can't get him out of my mind. They still have a BUNCH of my things that he took. If I don't get them back I'll take him to court (I have receipts...see I'm ill, NOT DUMB) but he thinks I'm being petty. I'm not, one thing they stole is my antique radio, circa 1920's. That means more to me than his life. He just took it, no request, just gone. He moved a lot of things when I was here at work.

Well...I could go on and on and on some more and then some but I have a bus to catch. I don't want pity, I don't want tears, I want vengenance. Like Kurt Russell said in my favorite western "Tombstone". Tell them I'm coming and HELLS COMIN' with me. LOL...but I mean it. I'm ready to face them both and their lies.

Oh by the way, I may not be Jennifer Garner, but I'm no Molly Shannon either. She looks horrible. In the video her hair was white with black roots, not blond white, bleached overly white and she had horrible teeth and I know her family had the money to fix them when she was young. Her house was a MESS and he forced me to clean even after the doctor told me to stay off my feet for a week. I was scrubbing floors the next day so I wouldn't get another beating.

I feel so betrayed, used, empty, lonely, scared, mad as hell, and you name it.
But i gotta go.
Hugs & Hope
Carla

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2004
In reply to: carla18
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 8:46pm

Carla,


I can really relate to how you are feeling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
In reply to: carla18
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:23pm

Carla, i had no idea what you went through in your marriage. i am so sorry. you know i will come down there and kick his *&^^%$ a** for you right? i've beat up plenty of men in my day (before i was diagnosed lol) believe me it would give me great pleasure to do that to a man like him. So he got married huh just think of the silly little witch he married and laugh your head off! black roots and all! i don't want to get too deep, they would definately kick me off the board for sure lol!

as far as your stuff, unfortunately, any thing purchased during the course of your marriage is considered community property but if you had it before the marriage, its yours free and clear. You know that VCR ruse was just to upset you and you have a right to be. if they have to resort to infantile games just to hurt you, how pathetic is that? you should send them back a tape of pamela and tommy lee and say now THATS making whoopie chester! the bat was a good move, get it all out mama buy another blank tape and finish off the job if you need to. im not gonna sit here and tell you how your better off without him etc. cause you know that already right? and thats not necessarily what you want to here anyway. you wanna hear, rip his head off!, break his kneecaps! oh i could say so much more if this wasnt monitored (hee hee hee)

we hold on to these horrible memories because thats what we're used to doing. making ourselves miserable because we don't know how to live any other way. we punish ourselves before anyone else gets a chance so when they abuse us, wee're already waiting for more abuse. its like being an addict, if you don't get that abuse on a daily basis, something just isn't right.

your XDH sounds like HE could do with a little ole therapy himself. He'll be back. he'll be knockin' on your door complaining about how shes not like you and he never should have left you.....blah blah blah and when he does? through a couple of business cards with your pdoc and tdoc name and address and phone number on them and tell him to tell it to someone who might give a flyin #$%^^&*^^(!

you know your my girl, i'll take care of you! want me to put a spell on him? (hee hee hee)

VALERIE

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2005
In reply to: carla18
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 11:42pm

Gee whiz, i just read morgaines response and i feel like a total idiot. i hope you don't think making fun is me taking it lightly cause i don't. i too came from an abusive household, it was my father, he was an animal. i know i use humor as a shield to hide my own faults and failures, and if i hurt you in any way, i am deeply sorry.

what morgaine said was true and you should listen to her, shes pretty perceptive about things.

valerie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2004
In reply to: carla18
Thu, 06-09-2005 - 12:23am

Val,


Awwww.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2003
In reply to: carla18
Thu, 06-09-2005 - 2:02pm

Carla --

I cannot believe the gall of that man. It's bad enough he won't stay away from you, but to send you a videotape of him and the trailer park trash chick?!? This man obviously needs professional help.

I think Valerie said earlier that men like that don't change. Unless he's had anger management classes and help, the time will come when he'll do that to her also. It may take awhile, but it will happen. Once their "honeymoon" is over, he will turn back into his ugly self.

I haven't been on the board this week -- have had a stomach virus - UGH. Today's the first day I haven't been in the bathroom all day - LOL

Hang in there and try to not answer his calls, the door if he's there, etc. Is there anyway you can block his telephone number from calling you?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: carla18
Thu, 06-09-2005 - 2:05pm

Hi Carla!


I'm sorry you're going through such a hard time right now.