Does stable equal 'flat'
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| Tue, 06-28-2005 - 12:23pm |
Hi,
I've posted here a bit and I have another question, but first some background. I take Abilify and Lamictal and have been pretty darn stable for a while now. I only get panicky a little bit and am able to just think of something else and calm down. No hypo-mania and just a tiny bit of depression now and then...
However, and this is where my question is leading... I can't seem to feel either happy or sad anymore (at all!)
Yesterday one of my beloved pets passed away rather suddenly. DH cried, and I hardly felt anything... a touch of sadness maybe, but no grief. I also don't seem to be able to feel happy about happy events (birthdays, anniversaries, vacations, etc.) ...just sort of flat, emotionless, and dragging along... Is this how 'stable' feels? 'cause I don't really care for it...
Catherine

Thanks...
I too have a lot of pets... 2 dogs and 4 (make that 3) cats. Maybe you are right, maybe I am just more accepting of losing them now (lost a dog about a year and a half ago and that was very traumatic)... Maybe because I am more stable, I just don't have the strong grief reaction that I used to... Hmmmm, something to think about.
One thing I found when I finally became stable was that it wasn't so much that I wasn't feeling emotions, it was that I had to learn what real emotion was. I was so accustomed to wild swings up and down that I thought they were normal. Therefore, when I DID have a normal happy or sad mood, it surprised me how minor they felt. Over time, I learned how to feel things again and now when something happy (birthdays, holidays, gifts, etc) or sad (loss of a pet, flat tire on car, etc) happens I have what I feel is an appropriate response.
At the same time, you should talk to your pdoc/tdoc about this. Maybe your meds are too high and your aren't able to feel things properly. That IS possible. You just need to find out which one you are experiencing.
Good luck and take care - SO sorry to hear about the loss of your pet.
Tracey
Catherine,
I don't have any answer for you, but agree with what has been said by others. It is something to definitely run by your pdoc/tdoc the next time you see them.
I've gotten to a point where I've felt *stable* but then, I either start swinging again or feel the flat feeling you describe. In my case it is due to the fact that we are still working on finding the right dosage, because pdoc has finally found the right meds for me.
I stress that this is only my own personal experience, because the one thing I've learned on this board is that no 2 people experience the same symptoms on the same meds for the same reasons, etc. Yours may simply be, as has been suggested, learning how to respond to emotions now that you have become stable. I live for the day when I can get to that point and stay there for more than a few days at a stretch;)
Much luck and a lot of (((((((((hugs))))))))))
traci
(((((Catherine))))),
I'm so sorry about your pet, I've been through this twice in the last couple of months (and lost a couple other critters in the last year or so) and I know it hurts and sometimes that hurt is enough that we refuse to process it completely, so we end up with that kind of hollow/flat feeling.
I just wanted to write to say that I feel the same as you. I take Lithium, Effexor, Seroquel and Klonopin and I know it's the Lithium that's giving me this "flat" feeling. But to me, I'd much rather feel this way than be manic or severely depressed, which I would be without the Lithium. I thought for months after I started taking it why I didn't really feel anything. But then I thought, it's better than feeling like you want to kill yourself or it's the end of the world, or on the other end, get no sleep and feel like a lunatic out of control.
Hang in there. Just remember that you're well, and maybe with time some of the emotions will begin to come back. If you really don't like feeling that way, then I would do as the others suggested and talk to your pdoc about it.
Best wishes,
Angie
Thanks to All for your responses...
I think most of you are right on track... feeling a little flat is way better than the alternative, I just felt sort of freakish for feeling so detached yesterday... I guess it's ok not to cry hysterically if I don't really feel like it :-)
Catherine
I just went through this VERY same thing when I got stable on Lithium.
Hi Angie!