Having a tough week. My orientation

Avatar for missyflanders
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Having a tough week. My orientation
5
Wed, 08-17-2005 - 3:59pm

on Monday has made me anxious and I am having panic attacks. I am constantly worrying about whether I should be attempting nursing school now or wait a few years until my children (2, 4 and 10yo) are older. Wondering if I even have the ability to be a nurse and questioning if it good for my marriage if I attend classes now, as dh is not happy with "us" most of the time, which he just sprang on me last week. He was talking counseling and now is not. He can not even tell me what he is unhappy about. Our 12th anniversary is Sunday and he has planned a special "date" for us, which is a surprise. I am telling you, we appear fine so I don't know what to do. I think I would rather be fighting so that I would know. I have figured out he needs more attention from me, but will I be able to do that with school? Now I am babbling. Thanks for letting me vent.

Missy

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2005
Wed, 08-17-2005 - 4:03pm

(((Missy)))


I hate when they do that !!!!!

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God could not be everywhere, so

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 8:18am

Missy, honey...let me tell you what i KNOW from experience...you have to do this for YOU. Right now. THis very moment in time. Okay? Your dh will support you or not. IN this or in something else. You have to talk to him point blank with directness and love and tell him this is what you want and this is what you are going to have. Men, if they feel neglected, in ANY way, shape, or form, will turn crazier than anything you've ever seen. I'm going through something similar right now, but I have to thank you for being so honest here and posting this, because I didn't really KNOW FOR SURE what I was dealing with, until I read your post.

It will be okay, honey. Your BP, and your anxiety could be making it seem much worse, not that I'm trying to trivialize it in any way either. Take it day by day, minute by minute and get through it...do NOT let it terrorize you into quitting school. YOU CAN AND WILL DO THIS! Promise me, you won't let it overwhelm you. Take it little by little. Orientation is HARD. They cram a LOT into a little bit of time.

We're here for you. As much as we can be. But I KNOW that you are strong and smart enough to do this. Okay?

Love and Hugs,

Keli

Avatar for missyflanders
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 11:16am

Thanks Donna and Keli -- I WILL be starting school on Tuesday. My kids and my dh will survive. As will I. At least that is what I keep telling myself. Your kind and encouraging words really helped me. I think I really need some sleep and may call pdoc today to prescribe something for the anxiety just to help me sleep at night. I keep busy enough during the days but evenings are a mess right now. Thanks again.

Missy

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 12:43pm

I know the feeling. Evenings are still touch and go with me too...and FORGET about the weekends...which is why i'm going to my parents this weekend...i get aggravated there, but there are no triggers there. I take an Ativan on the way home from work and its been getting better. I'm trying to keep myself more occupied. My dh has been working in the evenings, which i hate, rather be days, but its okay. I'm a big girl.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Thu, 08-18-2005 - 2:18pm

Missy,


I'm glad you decided to keep taking your classes--it's going to be an adjustment for you and the whole family, but you and they can both deal with it, even DH!


Hopefully your anniversary date will help clear the air and enable the two of you to reconnect as a couple, but don't be afraid to get some couples's counseling, too.


Hugs,


Marci