Donna...read me...
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Donna...read me...
| Thu, 09-08-2005 - 7:46am |
Have a great day...!
Just enjoy today for what it is.
We love you here, no matter what. Just wanted to tell you that!
Keli
| Thu, 09-08-2005 - 7:46am |
Have a great day...!
Just enjoy today for what it is.
We love you here, no matter what. Just wanted to tell you that!
Keli
You are so cute !!
God could not be everywhere, so
I'm glad you decided to take the day off, you deserve it...
As for me, don't even ask...I am now on the other end of the spectrum, manicky...and I can't decide yet if its the good manic or the bad manic...I'm not stable though, AT ALL, and I don't know what to do about it yet...i guess wait it out and see what happens...i'm definitely scared of the crash again...but if i contemplate it too much it will happen more quickly and harder...
I'm just fed up, basically...fed up and scared, and tired.
I don't want to go back into the hospital...but I see it looming in my near future...and I feel like such a loser/failure if it does happen. I truly do. I don't know how to stop those thoughts. I don't know how to stop ANY of the thoughts...the racing ones, the circular ones, the flashbacks, or the memories that are hitting me in the face like crazy...I just don't know anymore. I'm going to try to stay strong, I feel as though I am about to let everyone down though...
Guess that's not a great update, but its where I am.
I have forgotten how to take things a day at a time. I really have. So much is coming up from my past, and I have so much looming in my future, that I don't know how to live for only today. I just really really don't.
I'm sorry about the flashbacks...I'm not sure there is a way to stop them, or even if you should...as crappy as that sounds.
God could not be everywhere, so