Whine, Cry, Blah!!! ****Triggers??****

Avatar for singergal4u
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Whine, Cry, Blah!!! ****Triggers??****
4
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 11:00am

I just can't seem to get my "new" schedule to work. I think right now my mind is set on me getting this job so instead of waking up at 5am with Jeff to start my day I'd rather be getting out of a job I don't have yet to start a "new but different" schedule. Why do I do this to myself. I mean I don't have the job yet and my interview isn't until tonight at 11pm!!!!


Ok so I haven't been doing what's right and I've been sleeping in a bit later every morning but still getting Jeremiah off to school on time but he misses the bus because instead of getting him up at 6:30 I won't wake him up until after the bus already passes because I can't get out of bed. This happens if I get to bed at a good hour or not. Yesterday I kept him home because I thought he had a temp (couldn't really tell because my thermomiter doesn't work) and he was up most of the night



Christina; wife to Jeff; mom to Jeremiah, Brieanna, & Gavin

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 12:18pm

christina,

u r putting so much pressure on yourself and in the process getting soooo overwhelmed...i know, because i do the SAME THING! i'm sorry your day started out so badly!!! can you maybe try to take some steps away from the situation and then start over? i know how i sound, its not that simple, but if you COULD, it might work??? i dunno.

600 mgs of lithium a day is LOW. you probably do need more, but don't going doing it without a pdocs order, though i know you want to so badly to be more stable...i know its tough, but if you have to, if you get REAALLY bad off, you should go to the ER. take my word for it...once it starts spiralling out of control, it goes WAAAAAAY out of control fast...but i think u know that already.

hang in there and be safe...

talk as much as u want and need, k?

love and hugs,

keli




Edited 9/27/2005 1:16 pm ET ET by keli003
Avatar for singergal4u
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 1:15pm

Thanks Keli!!!


I was actually talking to my SIL in a decent conversation and she was telling me that sometimes I just need to do this or do that. Well it's easy for her to say because she's not MENTAL she's NORMAL. NORMAL people just don't understand. Jeff's aunt & uncle were here



Christina; wife to Jeff; mom to Jeremiah, Brieanna, & Gavin

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 1:26pm

Ya know...I think a lot of times those in our lives just give up trying to understand...they wish they could...they even try to for a long time...but then it becomes soooo very hard for them that they just give up trying to. My dh is absolutely wonderful...but this last depressive episode of mine almost did him in...it was horrible...and he tried his BEST to get it...but because he doesn't have it, he can't GET IT! I thank God he can't GET IT...but sometimes, just for a little bit, I wish he could...then he would know that I really AM just very BARELY hanging on...I hope your tdoc appt goes well tomorrow. Yes, it should be much more talk this time.

Hugs!

Avatar for singergal4u
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 09-27-2005 - 2:51pm
Even before I was dx'd with BP and Jeff and I would get into an arguement I would tell him that I'd love for him to be able to be me for 1 day.....24 hours.....to


Christina; wife to Jeff; mom to Jeremiah, Brieanna, & Gavin