on the subject of letters...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
on the subject of letters...
13
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 8:24pm

I'm here, quiet, trying to keep my emotions in order and things in check - the holidays are doing a real number on me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2010
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 8:31pm
Lolly. You write so beautifully. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. The holidays really are a butt kicker, aren't they? Hugs to you and your family.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2009
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 9:38pm

Hey Sweetie-

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 9:57pm

Hi Lolly,

Sorry you are having a difficult time.....holidays seem to bring out the best and worst in people.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2009
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 10:11pm

Sorry....hijack-

MC, It can be done!! I was a WRECK when my A ended.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2010
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 10:34pm

Lolly,

Im so sorry you are having such a tough time right now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2006
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 7:52am

Lolly,

Thank you for your beautiful post.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 11:34am
Thanks for your thoughts Cait - and yes the holidays are a serious butt kicker. The Christmas right after I lost my dad (2 years ago) was the worst - so I know that this one is probably more difficult for you than normal. many hugs going out to you!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 11:41am
Heartache -
That is exactly my problem - my people pleasing self-struggle has taken a battering like nothing I have ever gone through before. Even tho I'm a little ways out of things - I still have a lot of questions with myself and a lot of self guilt - The reality of of things tho as you so eloquently wrote - nothing to do but learn from our mistakes and look to the future - and to do that it means walking away without answers and for me that is one of the hardest parts.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 11:50am
Thanks for your thoughts MC -
Writing - whether in journal or in blog or on paper - is cathartic in big ways. I have written many entries in a private blog - when in past times I would have called the xAP for validation. It is especially important to have my voice - to put my thoughts and energy to heal out into the universe, even if no one ever reads it. I'm far from being a vet - but I am clear of the fog - always healing. Write often...
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 12:02pm
Renewal - thank you for your understanding - and for your support. and I want to weigh in on what you said to Heartache - Like the two of you - when I commit to a relationship whether friendship, love or even marriage - I put everything I am into it, but I don't think that has anything to do with people pleasing as much as it has to do with validation of self - that "I" have purpose in the universe and that at my grave I will be remembered. Your comment about becoming pleasers for ourselves is right on - i have had to learn to self-validate more and more these last few months and that has been a huge eye opener.
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