Having problems today

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Having problems today
11
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 1:11pm

Hi everyone,

I am 4 weeks NC today.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 1:56pm

Hi MC :)

I'm sorry you're feeling overwhelmed and sad today. Just remember that XAP isn't the pill that makes that go away. 4 weeks is a HUGE accomplishment - and missing him is normal. I'm coming upon 6 months, and I still have times when I miss xap. But I remind myself that the part I miss was the 2% of the relationship that was good. It's not worth the 98% that sucked rocks.

Do something special for yourself today to celebrate your 1 month mark. I'm so proud of you!

"Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you." - Lao Tzu

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 2:19pm

Hey MC!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 2:42pm
Hi Bodhi,
thanks for your reply..I did do something special for me .. a mani and pedi...
MC
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 2:48pm
Foggy...thanks so much for being here. And yes I did recognize those lines. lol Posted on happier days. I havent blocked exAP because I know him pretty well after 9 years. I asked him not to contact me and I know he wont. You are right though..there is always that sliver of craved contact. Thank you again for reminding me of all the good things in my RL. You have a good weekend too.
MC
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 3:21pm
Yep and happier days will come back soon...as long as you have NC.

I understand what you are saying...I did not/could not block my number from xAP either (lots of issues as to why), and although I knew as well that she would not use it..it none the less remained a sore spot for me. And I tell you, I too hope he does not contact you and you know him well enough...but it is not easy to do that. I struggled so hard to not once contact xap after she asked me not to (for the first time ever). So again I just encourage you to do so when you are ready...it will help I promise. And damn it all it takes is once for him to mess up...and then you will really know a down day. I do not want that, I am so happy to see how far you have come.

And no my friend...it was you who reminded me of all the good things in my RL with your words.

Sending calming vibes and encouragement to ride this wave and realize that once you do take a look around and see how much futhur ashore it has brought you.

peace&light
foggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 3:53pm
Congrats on 4 weeks MC!!!! And I can see how far you have come in that short time as I remember your first posts when I was a lurker. Boy I understand the down days..but gladly they get more infrequent over time. I have to agree with Foggy on the blocking issue. It is so wonderful to know xap will not contact me because he can't or at least I won't know if he tries. It has freed me from that last bit of hope that maybe just maybe...I promise if you take that last step to ensure NC you too will feel a weight lifted and will be protecting yourself from having to ignore him if he does try and contact you. Do it for yourself AND for him..hugs to you!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2009
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 5:12pm

Hey Sweetie-

I have to jump on this bus too on the blocking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 5:26pm

Hey MC,

Im so sorry you are feeling down and missing him today.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 9:55pm
Hi ILE, thank you for your support. I have deleted the chat program that I used with ex AP. So I do not go there...he has not called or sent emails. Im sure he wont. I want him to have a happy future too.
MC
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Fri, 12-10-2010 - 9:59pm
Hi Heartache....Well like i told ILE ...we always used a chat program..very few ph calls or emails. So with that gone from my computer I am not tempted to look for messages or check to see if he is online. Thank you for your help ..it means so much to have my friends post their words of wisdom.
MC

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