Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
You know I absolutely <3 you. This time of year just SUCKS because we're all supposed to be so freakin holly jolly. Well screw all the little elves and their joyfulness. Quite frankly, I'd like to poke one in the eye right now.
I am just dying this past week because of all the memories. Today is a huge trigger day because I can tell you exactly what we were doing this day a year ago. It hurts so bad for me right now but I am going to just soak up all this sadness as a reminder of how painful being in affair has been. It is easy to remember the good times when I am "longing" for him, but then I try to substitute those good memories for the memories that include him pulling back after a physical encounter. The times I didn't hear from him for a week. The continual roller coaster. The times I felt lower than pond scum.
You are one whole month NC. Girl, that is a hell of a lot to be proud of!! I was skeptical that you would make it my dear girl. You were in such turmoil. But MC, YOU DID IT. No one else did it for you. This healing journey you are on is all because of your CHOICE to do something good for yourself, despite the pain attached to it. I can not tell you how proud I am of you. Every dang one of us who has felt that pain knows how good it also feels to start regaining our power, resolve, dignity and everything else that belongs to US.
You wil make it. Yes, you are still entitled to feel absolutely crappy on some days. But you are going to make it, sister. I am here for you every step of the way. Big, big hug. Yes, tomorrow will be better.
MC, I hope you are feeling a little bit better right now, hugs to you to help you through the sad feelings. A new day always seems to bring a new view on sadness we maybe feeling and tomorrow is another day to add to your nc count. Four weeks is awsome, you are doing so well:) This weekend has been tough for me as well, women "issues" and it's wrecking havoc on my emotions! I've been battling demons all weekend. It's getting easier to pinpoint the sadness and up and down emotions, it's still a process to go through though and it's something we will need to continue working through for awhile. It will come together for all of us and I know you are going to be there when it does. You are very encouraging and supportive to all who are here so I know you are determined to be in a better place. Be kind and gentle to yourself as the weekend winds down MC:)
Hi Jen, Mon morning and I am feeling much better. Maybe weekends are tougher because we have more time to "think". I find it easier when I am busy at the office. Thanks for your post. I hope you have a great week! MC
Hi R4Me, Thank you for you hugs and support. Monday morning is here and I am over the bad feelings for now anyway. Its wonderful to have a place to post and friends to reach out to. I hope you have a good week getting ready for the holidays. MC
((((MC)))))))
it WILL BE. I PROMISE.
I had quite a few of those days...MC. It's like a tsunami of INTENSE SADNESS. :(
Comfort you. Lay Low. Dont fight it. Let the emotions go.
MC,
Hugs to you.
MC,
You know I absolutely <3 you. This time of year just SUCKS because we're all supposed to be so freakin holly jolly. Well screw all the little elves and their joyfulness. Quite frankly, I'd like to poke one in the eye right now.
I am just dying this past week because of all the memories. Today is a huge trigger day because I can tell you exactly what we were doing this day a year ago. It hurts so bad for me right now but I am going to just soak up all this sadness as a reminder of how painful being in affair has been. It is easy to remember the good times when I am "longing" for him, but then I try to substitute those good memories for the memories that include him pulling back after a physical encounter. The times I didn't hear from him for a week. The continual roller coaster. The times I felt lower than pond scum.
You are one whole month NC. Girl, that is a hell of a lot to be proud of!! I was skeptical that you would make it my dear girl. You were in such turmoil. But MC, YOU DID IT. No one else did it for you. This healing journey you are on is all because of your CHOICE to do something good for yourself, despite the pain attached to it. I can not tell you how proud I am of you. Every dang one of us who has felt that pain knows how good it also feels to start regaining our power, resolve, dignity and everything else that belongs to US.
You wil make it. Yes, you are still entitled to feel absolutely crappy on some days. But you are going to make it, sister. I am here for you every step of the way. Big, big hug. Yes, tomorrow will be better.
Love,
~alwayst2
(((MC)))
Tomorrow WILL be better.
Michelle & Always,
A new day always seems to bring a new view on sadness we maybe feeling and tomorrow is another day to add to your nc count. Four weeks is awsome, you are doing so well:) This weekend has been tough for me as well, women "issues" and it's wrecking havoc on my emotions! I've been battling demons all weekend. It's getting easier to pinpoint the sadness and up and down emotions, it's still a process to go through though and it's something we will need to continue working through for awhile. It will come together for all of us and I know you are going to be there when it does. You are very encouraging and supportive to all who are here so I know you are determined to be in a better place. Be kind and gentle to yourself as the weekend winds down MC:)
MC_
Sorry for the late chime in here bit I thinkat this point its been awhile and it starts sinking it that this is really "it."
Mon morning and I am feeling much better. Maybe weekends are tougher because we have more time to "think". I find it easier when I am busy at the office. Thanks for your post. I hope you have a great week!
MC
Thank you for you hugs and support. Monday morning is here and I am over the bad feelings for now anyway. Its wonderful to have a place to post and friends to reach out to. I hope you have a good week getting ready for the holidays.
MC