why you should be glad you arent me.

Avatar for suziq_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
why you should be glad you arent me.
4
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 10:48am
you know how i once mentioned that part of my mania manifested in having affairs?w/ really inappropriate people?well...last night i'm at my daughter's rehearsal & who shows up but my first attempt at an affair over 4 years ago,only all cleaned up & clean cut & SMARTER & SUAVER & i'm so unprepared for it that when i see him(& maybe it's the topamax)i fall down the stairs...& after exlaiming how humiliating THAT was i fall UP the stairs & when he asks if i'm ok i scream at him to leave me alone.
ok.thisis not going well at all.
well.at least he apologised for treating me so horribly years ago.
& said it was good seeing me.
right.
i am NOT having a good time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 10:53am

(((((((((Suzi))))))))I'm sorry you had to go through that. I can imagine it did catch you off guard and if he's more appealing than he was years ago, I can imagine why you lost it a bit. But, you survived it and it's done now. You are stronger for it, even if you don't realize it just yet;) Hang in there sweetie! We're here for you!


Love Ya,
Traci

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2005
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 10:54am

ok well...here's my take on it.


1.

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God could not be everywhere, so

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 12:20pm

Girlfriend,

I can SOOO relate...my mania too manifested in affairs...but you know that already...there was my ex from high school that i continued to "see" after i was married ugh...i saw him the other night at my freaking house no less, my dh is his friend...ugh ugh double ugh! he made me so sick! then he calls me at work the next day, but i didn't answer...i wanted to scream at him to leave me alone too...but i couldn't...i did totally ignore him though and HE KNEW IT! I felt sooooo good doing that! Such progress...

You hang in there...you did everything right...

My ex looked good too...i hate him...all of them.

Love and Hugs,

Keli

Avatar for suziq_3
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 1:38pm
as i was leaving rehearsal...here we get into what a slut i really am...
my phone rings...it's john..i'm driving john's kid home AND have just assured his neurotic wife who totaled her car & i tell john EVERYTHING so i tell him i just saw the old boyfriend & i'm freaking.it just so happens i've also been sleeping with john for years .
SLUT!
do you STILL like me?
mostly b/c john came on to me & i have a problem with saying no EXCEPT that john continued to come on to me since my hospitalization & i have since told him that it's unfair & inapproprpriate & if he's going to do it he should just stop speaking to me altogether so he stopped.good for me.
so i told him about bozo last night & he told me to get a grip & drive carefully.i'll probabably see HIM tonite at dd's rehearsal.
it's a wonder how i get thru everyday with this soap opera i've created.
what i wouldn't give for a chocolate cake.
that loss of appetite didn't last very long.i'm also smoking again.but only in secret.