Time to move on...
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| Fri, 11-04-2005 - 4:15pm |
I'm nearly certain he went to the assessment. I wanted to show my support so I went to the hospital with the guess of when he'd come out. Turns out I had and address for a hospital that is now closed. I came home, called & found out he never went for an inpatient assessment, but an outpatient treatment. They told me I had about 20 minutes before somebody who had his appt time would come out. I got there in 25 minutes & barely missed him.
He has not called me in days. So I believe she is still here. Never in 14 yrs have I gone this long w/o talking to him.
He did email me & said he's coming by tomorrow to pick up his things. I bought him a present for going into treatment. I'll leave it in the house ... it's big, he'll see it. I don't think I want to be here when he moves his stuff out. In his email he did ask for a convenient time for me, but I'm not going to respond.
I'm not going to file divorce as I do not want him to rush into anything with this woman. But I'm really not going to try to contact him any more. I know I've been advice that before, but I still did. Not to fight with him, but to sound happy, confident & supportive.
I have no idea if he's going to give me money or not. So I'll check my account tomorrow. If he hasn't deposited anything then I'll get my paperwork ready to go file for welfare next week.
Perhaps I should do it anyway as I have no idea if he's filed for unemployment while on leave & I do know he's not going to be getting any more money from work.
It sucks to lose your best friend and lover in one surprising sweep. I have no family here & it's against the law for me to leave due to the kids.
So I'll be absent here for a while. I doubt I'll have any new information in the up coming weeks.
Thanks for all your support.
Bonnie

Hugs to you Bonnie. I wish I had more I could offer you. Does your family know what is going on? Could they come visit you? Things will work out in the end, you'll see.
Why will you not be here? You can still be here.
Missy
Yes everyone knows what is going on due to the shock of it all. I had 2 family members here just weeks before this began & they saw how loving & well we were getting along at the time so they are in just as much shock as I am.
My mom lives in China, definately cannot come.
My younger sister's husband has lost 2 jobs in the recent months & she is borrowing money from my mom to buy food.
My older sister cannot believe I would want my dh back so she is not supportive at all and I'm not sure if I want her here or not. I did get my mom to agree to pay for her airfare as there were internet fares at the time I asked my older sister to come. She had agreed but now she won't even call me.
My brother died last December & my eldest brother would most definately not be supportive. Jeeze, I've been here for 5 yrs and he's never thought of visiting even while being in the state.
So no family. The few friend's I've made here are so busy with their families & though they are being supportive like to do things as family outings. Most of my friends were met through my dh as I have not worked out of the house since moving here. So their devotion is more toward dh than me anyway. (Even though dh will not even talk to them right now.)
I'm really shy & have a hard time making friends. But my neighbors have been really supportive & have been babysitting a lot & bringing me over fattening food since I've lost a lot of visible weight.
But I'm still very, very lonely.
Bonnie
"Only when we are sick of our sickness shall we cease to be sick."
~ Lao-Tzu, from The Tao Te Cheng
Bonnie,
I'm so sorry you're having to go through this, but even so I wouldn't give up on a possible change just yet.