He's moved out/smoking pot-trig?
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He's moved out/smoking pot-trig?
| Sat, 11-19-2005 - 11:36am |
My BP partner moved out on Thursday after having begged to come home. He is moving in with his parents. Our life is too stressful. The next day he called and wanted to come back but I can't let him. We have a 19 month old daughter and it's time for some peace and stability for her. (Sorry if I hurt anyones feelings)
When I was talking to him I could tell he had been smoking pot. I asked him if her were smoking a lot he said "not a lot." He takes Lithium and Zyprexa. I don't think he should be smoking pot. He has somehow convinced himself that he became psychotic because he quit smoking pot and tobacco a few weeks before he was hospitalized. I tried to get him to look back to April. The first time I can pinpoint that this incident was starting. You know money being spent carelessly. Being real pissy with me. Sleep disturbances. But he can't/won't connect with that. As far as he's concerned it was stopping smoking and the stress of his life with me and our daughter just a few weeks before his break.
I'm really mad because he went to a doctor that prescribes medicinal marijuana. They told him some of their patients have given up all meds but pot. That some of them have broken down and some of them have stabilized and been able to function on just marijuana. He of course thinks he is going to be one of those people.
I'm so sad. Sad for him, my daughter and myself. I know it is out of my hands but it is so painful.
When I was talking to him I could tell he had been smoking pot. I asked him if her were smoking a lot he said "not a lot." He takes Lithium and Zyprexa. I don't think he should be smoking pot. He has somehow convinced himself that he became psychotic because he quit smoking pot and tobacco a few weeks before he was hospitalized. I tried to get him to look back to April. The first time I can pinpoint that this incident was starting. You know money being spent carelessly. Being real pissy with me. Sleep disturbances. But he can't/won't connect with that. As far as he's concerned it was stopping smoking and the stress of his life with me and our daughter just a few weeks before his break.
I'm really mad because he went to a doctor that prescribes medicinal marijuana. They told him some of their patients have given up all meds but pot. That some of them have broken down and some of them have stabilized and been able to function on just marijuana. He of course thinks he is going to be one of those people.
I'm so sad. Sad for him, my daughter and myself. I know it is out of my hands but it is so painful.

i really don't know what to say here, except i'm sorry you are going through this.
as for the trigger point of the illness, he could have been in a manic phase in april, but the pot, as i've learned through a course i am taking, may actually in a very weird way be helping him as the doc suggests. many pdocs these days are rx'ing anti-convulsants for bp. the chemical THC that is found in the pot has been shown to act the same way. but to mix that with lithium and zyprexa? have my doubts about that.
as for him noticing the bp symptoms when he stopped smoking, when he was hospitalized was he depressed? a manic person, as he was in april, will not seek help or think anything is wrong because they feel so good. it is often when they become majorly depressed in the cycle that help is sought.
it is highly possible that he is using the pot as a crutch and that definitely has to be watched. and if he wants to come home, maybe suggest he see a different doc for a second opinion and you go with him. does he have a tdoc as well? for being bp, he should have a pdoc and a tdoc.
it is possible to have a peaceful and stable life once the right meds are found and the individual takes the meds and puts forth the effort to heal. i have battled with a lot and managed to survive it when i thought i wouldn't. yes, he'll still have break through depressions or break through manias but the important thing is when that happens work together to work through them.
i know having a 19 month old makes it hard on you to deal with all of this. and i would definitely be leary of having pot in the house. the curiosity at that age is powerful. but if you love him all i can suggest is that you try to have him see a different pdoc and you go with him so you can learn more about this disorder. knowledge, love and support are powerful tools when used together to achieve a common goal.
i hope i haven't overstepped here. if i have that wasn't my intention. i wish you the best with this. keep us posted on how it goes. you are always welcome to post here.
hugs,
traci
I do love him very much. He is the love of my life. But he has to take responsibility for his illness. I can't. His mom can't. He has to. I'm trying to be loving and supportive but bad behavior by him (which I can excuse to some degree because he is trying to get stabilized) and his family, particularly his mother, is making it hard to offer any support to anyone but myself and my daughter. We truly have noone living close by but he and his family and his mom is being truly awful to my daughter and I.
In the beginning she tried to blame me for his BP. This was after she had already admitted he had problems related to it all the way back to childhood probably at least in high school for sure. She just never got him diagnosed because he didn't want to go to the doctor.
I finally had to say to her that he was going to break down eventually no matter what. Whether he was living this life or just chillin with his homeys. Actually this life probably provided him with some stability and normalcy. When he became psychotic his friends would have just followed him around for a little while thinking he was tripping and then gotten tired of taking care of him and let him wander off into the forest barefoot. (I found his shoes at a bus stop. I thought that was what happened to him.)
It is very difficult to provide loving support when he has moved in with his parents and he has a mother that meddles. He unfortunately is not strong enough to tell her to mind her own business when it comes to his relationship with me and his daughter. I'm afraid he will look back someday and have some resentment towards her if he can ever see the truth.
As for the pot. I really want him to be monitored. I really want to go with him to the pdoc and tell him everything that I know that might help him but last appointment he wouldn't let me come because he "has to be able to take care of himself." Well needless to say, with a small daughter and the pot issue I feel its imperative I am a part of things if he wants to be with us.
I know pot can be very beneficial for many reasons but I think he needs to be monitored closely and needs to not be going to one doc about this and another about that. KWIM?
I really do appreciate your response and your candor. I'm really trying to understand but things are so messed up. BP is hard enougfh to deal with, I don't really need his mom behaving badly.
i think you are doing the right thing & making the right choices.my h's closest friend is on the same meds as your partner & my h was supplying him w/ pot & it didn't mix well with the meds AT ALL.as a preference the guy chose the pot over the meds & wound up in the hospital.
i forbade my husband to suppyhim w/ pot & personally think my h is a jerk to even suggest he "needs" his marijuana & all my troubles would be cured if i would just smoke pot.
you did good in my opinion.
& yes..it is painful...but something has to change,right?
While I seriously doubt that quitting pot was responsible for his psychotic break, it may have contributed to it in a small way.