Traci

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Traci
5
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 8:49am

How are you doing today?

Love and Hugs,

Keli

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
In reply to: keli003
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 9:32am

numb on the outside and dying inside if that makes any sense. i'm supposed to see tdoc at noon. i left her a message to see if i could change it but haven't heard back from her.


i hope you are feeling better today. thanks for asking about me. i know you will be off 'til monday, so have a happy thanksgiving.


love you,


traci

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: keli003
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 9:39am

Well, for today only...you can feel numb...today is a trigger day...don't fight it, just try to let yoursef FEEL your emotions today. I think that would help.

Just know we're here for you...and please talk as much as you need or want to...or not at all...just please be safe.

Go to tdoc if you can, honey...

Love you

Keli

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
In reply to: keli003
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 9:46am

that's why i wanted to make my tdoc appointment later. i'm afraid she's going to tap into those emotions and i have to work this afternoon. if i'm going to lose it, i would rather it be after work rather than while i have a bus full of kids. right now i have them safely sealed off. tdoc knows what today is and i don't think she'll let me keep a lid on them.


but i will go to my appointment. and i will try to stay safe. thanks ((((keli)))).


love you,


traci

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2005
In reply to: keli003
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 9:51am

Traci


I love u, and I'm sorry this is such a bad day...you do have the right to feel numb, but try to think of the good, not just that he's gone...k?


I hear ya about the appt, but she is doing what needs to be done...and if she can't change the appt....then get your butt in there !!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
In reply to: keli003
Tue, 11-22-2005 - 10:14am

thanks ((((donna)))). i'm just trying right now to get through the day. i can be ok, then something will come along......a song on the radio, or passing by where he used to live.....little things like that. there's others, but those are the two that stick out in my mind. then seeing how biodad is with dd makes me remember my dad and our relationship, then i remember i don't have that anymore. it just hurts.


so, as i still have not heard back from tdoc, i will go see her at noon and hope she doesn't open a can of worms that i won't be able to put the lid on by time to go back to work. work is a good distraction for me today. i'll keep you all posted.


i love u 2,


traci