just checking in. had a really hard session w/ tdoc. i have screwed up so bad with the si these past couple weeks and i only have myself to blame for it.
she told me to call pdoc because she thinks i should get on the lithium NOW. she suggested if i don't do that the hospital is next. she doesn't think i'm going to get through the holidays. she didn't say it in so many words, but that's the message i got.
so i've called pdoc and left another message. i called tdoc to let her know i'd done it so that if i don't hear back from him she can call him directly without having to go through his anal assistant.
i don't want another med. my god, i'm going to a new pdoc in 2 weeks. why add more now? but if it keeps me out of the hospital i'll do it.
anyway, that's where i am right now. thanks for the wishes too.
heard a little while ago from pdoc's assistant. care to guess who's on vacation? she is asking the other doc in the practice who's never laid eyes on me if there's anything he can do. this was about 1 and i've not heard back yet. it's not looking good. i called tdoc and left her a message that pdoc was on vacation. haven't heard back from her yet either.
i can't hide this from my kids anymore. i've been able to 'pretend' for so long and i just can't do it anymore. and that worries me 'cause dd16 feeds off of my moods and she gets all messed up. then she tries to 'fix' me. i've been able to function as a parent up 'til now, but even
pdoc's partner called me back about 6:30 last night. he's not going to do anything to my meds because of the mix i'm on. but on the bright side he did tell me to call him if there was anything i needed. wtf?
so now i've gotta tell tdoc and that scares me. 'cause of what she said yesterday.
it's 3 days til christmas. i have to be here with my kids. i've thought about telling tdoc i haven't heard from pdoc but she can find out if she doesn't already know. lying to her would not be good right now. i don't know anymore.
just checking in. had a really hard session w/ tdoc. i have screwed up so bad with the si these past couple weeks and i only have myself to blame for it.
she told me to call pdoc because she thinks i should get on the lithium NOW. she suggested if i don't do that the hospital is next. she doesn't think i'm going to get through the holidays. she didn't say it in so many words, but that's the message i got.
so i've called pdoc and left another message. i called tdoc to let her know i'd done it so that if i don't hear back from him she can call him directly without having to go through his anal assistant.
i don't want another med. my god, i'm going to a new pdoc in 2 weeks. why add more now? but if it keeps me out of the hospital i'll do it.
anyway, that's where i am right now. thanks for the wishes too.
love u,
traci
(((((Traci)))))
as bad as this may sound right now...I'm very happy that tdoc is getting serious about this...
God could not be everywhere, so
heard a little while ago from pdoc's assistant. care to guess who's on vacation? she is asking the other doc in the practice who's never laid eyes on me if there's anything he can do. this was about 1 and i've not heard back yet. it's not looking good. i called tdoc and left her a message that pdoc was on vacation. haven't heard back from her yet either.
i can't hide this from my kids anymore. i've been able to 'pretend' for so long and i just can't do it anymore. and that worries me 'cause dd16 feeds off of my moods and she gets all messed up. then she tries to 'fix' me. i've been able to function as a parent up 'til now, but even
pdoc's partner called me back about 6:30 last night. he's not going to do anything to my meds because of the mix i'm on. but on the bright side he did tell me to call him if there was anything i needed. wtf?
so now i've gotta tell tdoc and that scares me. 'cause of what she said yesterday.
it's 3 days til christmas. i have to be here with my kids. i've thought about telling tdoc i haven't heard from pdoc but she can find out if she doesn't already know. lying to her would not be good right now. i don't know anymore.
well that's my update.
traci