What do you all do for work?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2002
What do you all do for work?
7
Mon, 02-06-2006 - 7:21pm

I would like to ask other bipolars: what do you do for your career, and is it the career you dream of now or is it the career you dreamt of when you were starting out in the world after high school?

When I graduated from HS, I dreamt of being a college or professional level orchestral conductor. I majored in music at one of the U.S.'s top music schools and did well at first, but started having a lot of trouble in my third year. It was that year I had my first major bipolar episode (a psychotic break). After that, it was all I could do to keep up with the course requirements, and I stopped improving at my craft. By the time I graduated with my BA, I was ready to quit music not because I had stopped loving music, but because the kinds of people in power in music made the whole thing seem impossible. I was at that time having a lot of trouble becoming stabilized, too.

In 1999, I got accepted at a conducting seminar, and had the time of my life. Though I was still having trouble with stabilization, I thought, "this is the best, this is STILL what I want to do!" I applied at kind of a no-name school to get my conducting masters. Two years later, I completed that master's, but figured that the political machine that one had to work through to get anywhere in that level of music was more than I could stomach.

Around this time, I got stable, and my dream changed...

I decided, enough with the snobbery of the pro music world. Music teachers put more music in the world, anyway! I got a job teaching middle school band. That was not a success, because word got out somehow that I had a mental illness, and after that the principal made my life a living hell.

I still dream of teaching now, but I'm not doing it.

I will soon receive my NY state certification, but I am living in Canada with my new husband and cannot work due to my immigration status. I am hoping the NY cert will aid me in getting Ontario certification when the time comes.

Thing is, I am 33 years old. I am at the point where a lot of people are at age 22. Where did the time go? Can I blame any of it on bipolar?

Express!
Beth "Petrouchka"

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 02-06-2006 - 8:30pm

Beth,


I don't think you have anything to be ashamed of or blame--you've accomplished a heck of a lot and I have no doubt you will be a wonderful teacher

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2005
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 8:29am

I too think you have come very far...age is nothing now a days.

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God could not be everywhere, so

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 11:44am

Career? Ha. I work. I'm lucky to have my job. I'm not stable and I won't ever be completely stable...even on great meds that I'm on now. I'm close...

I have an okay job as an Admin Assistant/Budget Coordinator for a Chemistry/Biology lab in the State of Florida. Its more dramatic sounding than it actually is. I work with some really snobby guys with PhDs who think they are ALL that and more. The lab chemists and biologists are more humbled. The PhD guys are mostly in the 40s, white, upper middle class and prejudiced against most things that aren't white, upper middle classed and in their view perfect I can't stand it. My boss is one of them. He pretends well.

Anyway, I am locked in. I make just enough money to keep me from leaving. I couldnt go anywhere else and make more...and with my BP, I couldn't go anywhere else and be crazy either...at least here they are almost used to it.

No, this isn't my dream. I don't know what my dream is. I don't even allow myself to think about it.

You have come a VERY long way...and you should be REALLY proud of YOU! You can teach eventually...go for that much.

Hugs,

Keli

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2002
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 11:45am

Believe me, I would LOVE it if merely marrying a Canadian citizen made me a citizen. They make the process very complex because there are too many people from developing nations that try to get in illegally (just like in the U.S.). When Gary and I married, I was given a visa, and a whole lot of paperwork to fill out. The paperwork was so nasty we eventually got a lawyer to help us. We still haven't filed, but once we do, it will take eight months for them to investigate us, and only then will I be a legal resident who is able to work. I will be a resident for three years before becoming a full citizen.

Fortunately, I can apply for teacher certification once I am a legal resident.

Express!
Beth "Petrouchka"

P.S. Take it from me, only marry a guy from another country if you really love him. It is a lot to go through;0!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2003
Wed, 02-08-2006 - 8:33am

It sounds like you're still doing the conducting you wanted to do, just in a different setting.


I was in the Air Force, but my BP was undiagnosed and untreated then and I couldn't handle it. So I took my first opportunity, my oldest ds, to get out. Now I miss it and want to come back in, but they won't let me. Then I had a part-time job at Target, but when I was put into the psych ward they fired me with no notice. (Illegal, yes, but not a job worth fighting for.) A month after I got out of there

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Wed, 02-08-2006 - 4:56pm

Beth,
I think you are doing great. I hope to be even close to where you are when I am 33. I am 28 now and still working on my bachelor's degree. The only reason I majored in Sociology was because it was the major with the least math and the most "fun" classes. It turns out that I really enjoy my classes but I have no desire to do anything in the field. I have never had a real job, other than a couple of months at a grocery store and a couple of months in a daycare, I quit the first because I told a customer off and didnt want to get fired, and then I quit the second because kids drove me crazy....lol now I have two, go figure. So anyways, I am toying with the idea of going for my Masters in Library Science because I love books and its the only place in the world I have ever felt remotely sane, so I figured if I am gonna work eventually I may as well work somewhere calm and quiet so I can at least stay somewhat sane. So I didnt have to work and deal with my BP and now I just decided to do something that will work With my BP instead of working BP into it. But, my DH is working on his degree in Mechanical Engineering and once he is done, I may not have to work at all, so I might not...but who knows.

Rebekah

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Thu, 02-09-2006 - 9:16am

I'm an attorney. It's the only thing I ever wanted to do and I made it. One of the blessings I got from having BP is that once I focus on something - look out! It's as good as done. I had enough mania to stay up studying all night thru law school and the bar exam while still being an editor on the school's law review. Oddly, being an attorney suited my mental state more before I began treatment for all my craziness. Now that I'm in recovery from addiction and receiving treatment for BP, I think I'm a more effective attorney but I don't like it as much as I did. In the beginning I was all wrapped up in the ego of becoming an attorney. Almost 16 years of practice, and its just a job like any other. Nothing glamorous about it, nothing like you see on the television. The biggest blessing is that I make a decent amount of money working however many hours I feel like working. I don't take on more cases than I can handle (I'm pretty much a solo practitioner). My office is right in the town where I live so if my kids need something during the day or my special needs DS guy has a doctor appt. or other emergency I can be at his school in minutes. Overall, this career suits my needs.

Kristin, I'm an ex-military wife myself. I never did make any friends on post. 18 years ago my H was an officer assigned to the 82nd airborne and I had to attend those mandatory officers' wives "coffees" once a month and those stupid hail and farewells and I just never fit in. I came dressed inappropriately (I think that's a normal part of growing up in NJ, we're only dressed appropriately for NJ - outside of the northeast we probably look slutty!!!), I didn't care for the other wives, I had nothing in common with them. It was very difficult for me. My heart goes out to you; its not an easy lifestyle.

To whoever posted about more easily making friends with other BPs, I've learned to spot someone with BP a mile a way. I'm manic, and I can sniff out another manic - although its not very difficult: they usually talk a mile a minute, switch topics every ten seconds, gesticulate, smoke cigarettes, stroke their hair, you know. Unless they've just drank 10 cups of coffee, they're probably manic. I also relate very well to these people, and just "dented cans" in general. The majority of my friends now are other recovering addicts, my secretary is BP, a recovering addict and suffers from depression, the other attorney in my office is married to a recovering addict. Maybe its because we can tolerate each other! Who knows.

Love, Mo.

mo 7-18-10