((Keli))
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| Wed, 03-08-2006 - 5:55am |
Grrr - if it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have any. I've been SO busy at work that I have been just exhausted. SO, last night about 9pm I went to bed (yeah, I know, ME!). I was out by 9:30. THEN, at 3 am (THREE, yes 1-2-THREE) someone was knocking on my door. I walked out into the living room before realizing that I couldn't answer the door without clothes on. By then they were POUNDING on the door. Mike came up and got the door - it was the COPS. OMG give me heart failure. They started asking him questions (and I am trapped in the hallway next to the door and can't get to my room to get clothes) about which deck outside is ours. Finally, they tell him they have the wrong apartment. I was freaking out wondering what one of us had done!! Then we hear them pounding on the next door down. Those creeps that live there would NOT answer the door. Mike went into the bedroom - which shares a wall with them - and heard ANOTHER cop outside at the neighbor's patio door. FINALLY, one of them opened the door enough to argue with the cops. Not sure what was going on but she was REALLY ticked off and told him what he could do to himself because she wasn't letting them into her apartment. Needless to say, they informed her they WILL be back with a search warrent. (OOOOOO!). Finally, they left. That was about 3:30/3:45.
Could I get back to sleep??? NO! I am SO tired and wide awake. I think I will curl up in my big chair with a blanket and hope to crash, but at this point I only have another 1-2 hours before I have to be up :(
ANYWAY, I wanted to see if you were still doing ok? Wellbutrin kicking in yet?
You have a better head on your shoulders then you give yourself credit for. You are just too dang hard on yourself sometimes :)
Take care and I'll ttyl!
Love ya!
T

Hey...that sucks! I would have been freaking out too! Yeah, I'm doing okay...I think think think (!!!) the Wellbutrin is starting to kick in. Fingers crossed. I went to bed very early last night too, and watched t.v. Like 7, but fell asleep around 9:30. Ate like 4 (yes, 4) times yesterday (and not the right things each time) and took Li 3 times like I was supposed to. But its okay. I already figured out that I have to stop being so hard on myself. Because I am...about EVERYTHING. And its just NOT worth it...So, I'm 50 pounds overweight right now...so what. The world is NOT over. I'm not going to go back to starving myself again. I might get more pointers from you from your friend at work about WHAT to eat since I need about 5-6 small meals a day. If you have time. Topamax isn't doing much anymore with appetite suppression, nothing...so I need things to keep me fuller, but won't pack the weight on...
I want to move...I found the apts I want to move into, and they are in the school district Mike wants to be in for next year...I need a change SO DESPERATELY. I jsut don't know if I can get approved. So, that's on my mind. I have to get out of where I am...I'm just really tired of it there, its depressing me...I figured that out a day or so ago...I need a new place...and this place has a fitness center, a hot tub, 2 pools...I want to go there...Eric won't like it...but I'm not giving him a choice. Go me, right? The only thing is these apts are multi-level and they probably don't have one on the 1st floor available.
I am keeping very mindful of the fact that I consciously/subconsciously sabotage my well-being a lot of the time. Trying to see if that helps. Haven't called the therapist yet because I can't afford it until April, sometime. But I will.
I need to be really really busy today...I've had some trouble with focus lately...but I have to force it somehow. Just don't wanna.