Dealing with actual stress
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| Thu, 04-06-2006 - 1:22pm |
So, I'm just getting over a seasonal mood swing, and I had to go to a meeting at my daughter's school yesterday for her IEP (individual education plan; she's developmentally delayed) and it was just awful.
Speech therapist walked out in tears; Ellie (my daughter) was totally denied individual therapy and nothing was solved.
It's going to be a long, on going, stressful process and I'm already reverting to bad habits. I didn't pick my daughter up today for therapy b/c I just dont' want to leave the house.
I ate chips and dip for lunch (I have diabetes, too, so that is NOT taking care of myself properly). I just want to sit and cry all day. And, I stayed up all night on the computer reading advocacy stuff (not good to stay up all night; plus, I have until the end of the month to prepare, so there was no need to stay up.)
Anyway, does anyone have any tips for getting through stressful times like this? Last time I was under this much stress, Ellie was in the hospital, and I was with her, and somehow just being somewhere "safe" helped. But clearly, that's not an option right now.

I don't have my folder on me now, but I will post some of the coping strategies I learned in my CBT and DBT group.
Meanwhile you are in my thoughts and prayers
Hey Lady, I've been thru this and my heart goes out to you. My DS8 is physically handicapped and I've dealt with early intervention, district programs, advocacy groups, etc. You're right - this is actual stress. No doubt about it. In my personal opinion, it doesn't get much worse.
How to deal with it? God, I wish I knew. I remember back to the diagnostic process, etc., when I was running my DS around to doctors, therapists, etc., getting blood drawn and tests taken, MRIs, buying equipment, trying to make his legs "work." I still feel sick to my stomach when I think about it, and truth be told, I don't know how I got thru it.
Don't be too hard on yourself. So your child missed a therapy session today. That's not the end of the world. Give yourself one day to lay around eating chips and dip (that's sounds awesome, by the way!) then vow to begin again tomorrow. Tomorrow's Friday, so maybe you can promise yourself some down time on the weekend if you just get thru tomorrow doing everything you have to do.
And don't underestimate for one second how difficult this all is. You're not being weak or whiny, or anything else negative. Remember that you have taken on about the most difficult job there is - the mother of a special needs child. You may not have taken it on willingly, but that's where you are now and I'm sure that more days than not your DD knows she's loved. Isn't that the most we can ever ask for our kids???? For them to know that they're loved????
Hang in there, and please feel free to vent to me about this any, any time. More sympathetic I couldn't be. Love, Mo.
Any tips on how to NOT strangle the freaking staffing specialist? She DEFINES the term "gatekeeper". I swear to gawd, I wanted to body slam her.
It took ALL my willpower to not get up and slap the hell out of her. I haven't felt that angry in a very, very long time.