Freaking out about health issues...
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| Thu, 04-20-2006 - 12:11pm |
I know this isn't all that relevant, and I apologize for posting...but I'm truly freaking out. I have had these symptoms that are developing very quickly, but I have been to the doctor so much for stupid things that she no longer takes me seriously...and even my therapist says I need to stop making doctor's appointments or trying to see a specialist.
But my doctor did agree that she had no explanation for what has happened to my feet...many of my toes have turned under and in so that it is somewhat hard to walk, and my balance is off. And now it's started in on my right hand...one of my fingers is crossing over the other, and my fingers are thickening, so it's hard to write.
And my hands and feet are ice cold, and I can't get warm, even though it's in the 70s outside...have to wrap up in my electric blanket just to be OK.
And even my face, I feel like it's started to affect my lips too. I know what this likely could be, and there is no good treatment, but I feel like I need to see a rheumatologist to try to do whatever I can before it goes any further. Already, what am I going to do...I'm right-handed, and I need to write for my career, and I'm having trouble! I'm starting to have near panic attacks most of the day when I think about it.
The ironic thing is, I'm in a medical center, surrounded by doctors. Even more ironically, the dean of my school is a rheumatologist who is the regional specialist for treating scleroderma, which is what I'm worried I have. But I know I can't just make an appointment to talk to her and then bring this craziness up...right??!
It's so awful that no one takes me seriously...I know I'm depressed and anxious and turn that anxiety into physical things...but this is really something happening. I had a friend of mine (also a medical student) check it out just to be sure, and he agreed that there is definitely something there, and he also suspected scleroderma...which really, really freaks me out...that is an awful diagnosis, one of the only rheumatological diseases they really can't treat, and then you just get trapped in your own skin...and that could also explain this weight loss and diarrhea, possibly, but maybe not...
Ugh...freaking out like crazy...sorry, totally irrelevant to the board, just had to get it out...sorry...but what would you guys do??!
Rose
Edit: I do have another appointment with my pdoc this afternoon to follow up on my new meds, so I will mention this again, not that she's the one who's taking care of my physical health...hopefully I won't fall apart emotionally again too after seeing her...
Edited 4/20/2006 1:36 pm ET by rosa444
Edited 4/20/2006 1:39 pm ET by rosa444

you should bring it up...and if its that noticable..sorry but wtf is wrong with these doctors then?
God could not be everywhere, so