Our offer of support still stands with open arms. I love what you said about "I am not distraught about walking away. I am afraid of failing". As someone who has "failed" at ending so many times before this really resonated with me. In the end I just gave up on trying to end "my way" because it clearly wasn't working. Instead I put my blind trust in the wonderful people here at EAS and did everything I was told. I blocked every avenue of contact, practised what I would do if he ever broke through, read every post in the healing library, pinned sheets of insights to the wall of my office, took up yoga, reframed every nostalgic thought of him, forced myself to consider the pain of our spouses and five children on D-day, thought deeply about the way I want my life to be remembered, threw myself into the service of others, felt gratitude for the blessings all around me, and started to live the life I have HERE and NOW. And it's working. Six weeks and two days after ending, I feel strong and free and happy to be walking the road I'm on. If I can do it anyone can!
Our door is always open to those who want and need support. Much like a free clinic, we offer information, BTDT counseling, hugs, and a safe place to express your feelings. We all understand your pain and want nothing more than to help ease it, while at the same time offering you tools on how to avoid further heartache. Remember that NC is not a punishment, but a gift you give to yourself and your family.
IDK, You are right that the story doesn't matter. It is only important that you found your way back here. Keep your head held high. As you know, there is much work to be done. You'll have our support, encouragement and shoulders to cry on as you set foot on this healing path again.
Welcome back idkwiwt:) Coming back for support is a good step and you definately will recieve sound wisdom and awsome support here. It is so true that the story of the A is not important and what is important is working through the pain of what got us to an A to begin with. I have been doing some reading on triggers and one point I read was to take the time to separate the pain of the trigger from past and current situations. It is hard to do at the time but I am finding I am willing to pursue those feelings not long after I experience them which is progress over burying them like I did in the past. This journey definately is a process and having EAS as a sounding board is helping keeping me real. Big hugs to you:)
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
We are all here for you
V888
xxxx
Welcome ... back!
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IDKWIWT
You wont miss the thing that caused the pain, but you will miss the feelgoods that came before the pain.
Welcome back! We're happy to have you here.
Sunshine and smiles
Kat
Welcome back.
((Hugs))
You are right that the story doesn't matter. It is only important that you found your way back here. Keep your head held high. As you know, there is much work to be done. You'll have our support, encouragement and shoulders to cry on as you set foot on this healing path again.
Warm hugs,
Alwayst
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You are right the story doesn’t matter. Oh the other hand our motivation for going NC DOES MATTER.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.