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another trigger
| Sat, 07-15-2006 - 11:20pm |
I know I've already done this once and you all are sick of it but I need to vent again. Thanks everyone for replying the first time it's good to know you all care, don't worry about responding again. I feel so so SO awful. I don't know if I've ever been so depressed every part of my body hurts. I just feel sick with depression. I can't go on like this, I'm in immense pain. I don't know what to do. I know I'll come out of it but when? I took an abilify 4 hours ago and it didn't help at all. I hate life like this.

(((((MEG)))))
Good morning, sorry I missed this last night, you must have posted soon just as I was logging off.
Honey, I'm worried about you! I'm sure you don't want to hear this, but I really think you should call your pdoc's answering service or go to the hospital. You deserve to feel better than this. It sounds like the anxiety is making everything worse, the more depressed you get the more anxious you get, which makes you more depressed and down you are going. I hate to hear that you are feeling this bad. Are you being honest with your mom about how you are feeling right now? You really need to be. She is here to support you- and you need to let her help you.
Please let me know how you are doing this morning!
Love,
Peg
Vent all you need to. It always seems to help me when I see things written and know other people understand how I'm feeling. You *will* come out of this. You worry me when you say "I can't go on." I apologize for not following all the threads real close but I have the impression you just started on Lamictal and were waiting for it to work. Have you called your doc or did you just see him/her? Even if you did it sounds like its time for a call. There's also always the ER. Please be safe. {{{Hugs}}}
Morgaine
Hi Peg,
I survived the night, luckily. This morning I am ok, a little on the downside but that's how yesterday started out. You really never know. I'm just wondering why my lamictal isn't working better by now... I've been taking it 6 weeks and I'm up to 200 mg. Supposedly this is really where the maximum effect takes place. Anyway, I thought about going to the hospital last night but really, what would they have done with me? Given me an antipsychotic? I took abilify and it didn't really help any. I would never hurt myself, even if I want to. I know it would tear my mom apart if I did and I just couldn't handle that. Thanks for checking in.
How's the topamax this morning? Maybe I'll switch over to it :)
Meg
{{{{{{{{{{{{{Meg}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm glad to hear you made through last night safely. I am sorry I missed this post last night.
I understand your frustration with the lamictal, and as much as I hate to even suggest this, it may just not be a viable med for your system and your pdoc may need to try something else.
As for the ER, they can keep you safe and give you meds that you need. I know how hard it is to swallow your pride and go......BTDT in fact just about 2 weeks ago. But, I ended up going and found out what was causing my symptoms. They will run lab work to see what the levels of certain meds are in your system, not sure if lamictal is one of them or not. I got the rash so I had to stop taking it. But, if it gets that bad for you again, PLEASE go to ER or vent here or talk to your mom. We ALL want you to be safe. Pride is a wicked enemy when one is bipolar.......trust me, I know.
Definitely call your pdoc tomorrow and ask him/her about the effectiveness of the lamictal. After 6 weeks, there should be some difference. There is absolutely no reason that you should have to feel like you do when there are meds out there that will help you.
Keep us posted, vent all you need to and stay safe sweetie. We're here for you.
Hugs,
Traci